Nino Mod (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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ninoexchange2018-06-23 08:12 am
nino_mod) wrote in ninoexchange2018-06-23 08:12 am
Entry tags:
fic for icecreamsuki!
For: icecreamsuki
From: :3.
Title: Alive A Life
Pairing/Focus: Nino/Ohno
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 7100
Warnings: Angst
Summary: On their 8th anniversary, Ohno went to Nino’s house to ask for Nino’s parent’s approval to marry him. It was the happiest day for Nino. He couldn’t stop looking at the ring from Ohno. When Nino drove them back home, he was too happy. He latched his hands with Ohno from time to time. When it was still green, there’s a boy running for his toy. Nino couldn’t control his brakes. Somehow, the ring’s brightness blinded him.
Notes: Hi icecreamsuki-san, it’s a pleasure writing for your prompt. I took the ‘angst’. So I hope this fic could be welcomed :)). There is some medical notes in this fic, I am not working with any medical stuff or such. But I hope it’s fine and fit in this fic.
Thank you so much for bb J for being a beta reader for this fic. Thank you for bb Z, I senpai, S neechan <3
And a lot of thanks to nino mod <333
Title taken from Kamen Rider Ryuki’s OST.
Another day in another season; this time, the flower stopped blooming. Some leaves changed its colors, some travelled away through the wind. The world kept moving nevertheless. He was still breathing, his heart was still thumping. He was alive, one of the biggest reasons that kept him going. Morning fragrance with dew damping the surface and moist air around him refreshed him. The sun would soon erase all the humidity. It would warm him and assured him that he could carry on through the day.
Nino greeted some people he passed along the hallway. It was a routine for him to say ‘good morning’ and bow to the people he met. The people here were nice to him. They have known him well as he often spent his time around here. What he loved most was the special garden he could pass before he reached his destination. The garden always gave nice fragrance from its well-kept flowerbeds. The lively nuance made him more confident and have more faith. As he recognized the sun has raised, he walked confidently to his usual place. The bright sun was also another thing that always reassured him. The brightness in his vision led him to walk assertively although once in a while he held tighter to his stick.
“Morning,” He opened the door by heart. Everything in this room was neat and organized. It helped him not stumble along the way. Even though these four walls were actually threatening, it made him less worried as they support Ohno well in this room. He was actually disappointed when Sho mentioned that he couldn’t bring anything to this room. He couldn’t bring Ohno’s favorite flower to make the scent around the room be fresher. All he could smell was disinfectant around Ohno.
He lurched forward without any difficulties as he was used to this room, and also because of how spacey the room was. He could move around without bumping into anything, but even if he did, there wasn’t anything that could harm him. Besides, most people here were a great help to him. Nino loved to call them fairies. They were all kind-hearted; taking care of him, helping him and were always by his side even without him saying anything. There were times when he couldn’t utter anything out of distress, when he needed someone to lean on but he just couldn’t say it. Magically, anyone would come to him and soothe him. This kind of attention made him thankful despite the uncertain condition he was currently having. Some elders even claimed him as their grandson, some even wanted him as their son-in-law. He always rejected them politely, saying he didn’t need it as he was happily engaged to his partner. It warmed his heart to know that people loved him as much as he loved them.
As he found his comfortable spot, he sat by the bed next to Ohno’s sleeping figure. His hand searched for the other’s long fingers. They were soft and warm. Those long fingers and bigger palm also always made him feel secure. The warmth, which spread through the open palm, appeased him whenever he clasped it with his. Leaving their hands tangled, he began his monologue.
“Hey Satoshi, your hand is getting softer these days. It’s really not fair.” Nino pouted as he stared ahead. He placed the said hand on his cheek before he started again, “You know what, I’m playing piano again. Today’s song is one of your favorites. The Beatles one. The one you urged me to compose to a sheet music. Surprisingly I composed it with so much ease last night. Aside of my nonstop tears, I noticed that I finished the sheet in less than an hour. You must praise me or I’ll be so sad. Also I have a good news to tell, Yuki-chan is going to have another baby. She surely goes out so often. It seems she’s getting more beautiful, every male cat around our neighborhood really loves her. You really should see them. She’s surrounded by male cats every time I see her in the evening. She still accompanies me and dutifully finishes her dinner. But you know what, she acts like a queen these days. But well since she’s so pretty, it really can’t be helped. Even Aiba-chan said, ‘if Ohno-kun doesn’t wake up very soon, I’ll snatch Yuki-chan.’ He already declared that he would like to take Yuki-chan away. Also you know what, this is the most important one, Jun-kun has come back. He moved to the apartment next to ours last month.” He stopped for a moment, swallowing the invisible lump, which then only made his throat dry. “Last month, Ohchan. Jun-kun said he would like to accompany me though I said I already have Yuki-chan with me every night. Jun didn’t mean to snatch me away, but I think he has a plan. You still remember Jun-kun almost confessed to me back then, yes? Just like what Aiba-chan said, if you don’t wake up soon. Jun-kun will..” He choked. He couldn’t carry on because it’s getting too much. His previous wound seemed to open once more. Although he was physically fine now, he sometimes felt the sting in his body. Aoi said it was just his trauma. He should be better if he didn’t focus on the past event.
Before the accident, he used to hate the sun. He said it would only make him burnt. He said the sun was somehow harming him, not cooperating with him well, making Ohno tanner. Sunlight often made his vision too bright. That was why he preferred being under a dim light, or worse, in a dark place. He was fine with a lamp; at least it wouldn’t crash his skin. But now, under any kind of light, it helped him know that he was alive. The light also often guided him to reach Ohno’s hand like this. Thus, he understood he shouldn’t complain anymore.
His life turned out to be a bit confusing recently. He tried his best to manage it nevertheless. Thanks again to those fairies that have helped him. They never took their attention away from him. He was not giving up because he was sure that everything would be back to normal. He would laugh with Ohno again, hold his hand, walk by his side, and even play and sing in front of his grand piano again. He was sure of it.
Nino didn’t bother to hide his tears when someone approached him. “They say there will be downpour today even though the sun is so bright outside. Did you bring your coat?”
Sho didn’t wait for his answer. He checked on Ohno’s condition just like he usually did every morning. He didn’t trust anyone but himself. That was why he always made sure it was him who checked Ohno every day.
“GCS* is around 4. Thank you, Ohno-kun.” Sho meant to whisper, but often he would blurt it out where Nino could hear. Nino recognized what it was about but pretended not to hear it. Aoi told him that GCS was something to measure one person’s condition in comatose. Nino didn’t want to know about this. He only needed Ohno to open his eyes, to take him in his arms once more.
This morning view was actually the most heartbreaking thing for Sho. He hoped his decision was right and the news he was about to tell Nino wouldn’t make the younger man hate him. He glanced at Nino’s figure who obediently waited for Sho to finish. Their tangled hands clasped tight as if it was meant to be that way since the beginning. After 10 minutes of checking the necessities, he led Nino out of the room.
“I’ll be back,” Nino whispered close to Ohno’s ear before he stood up and left. The ward was now bright enough for Nino, he could tell by the light which came in through his vision.
“Have you had your breakfast? I hope you haven’t because Yumi baked too much melon pan again. She said, ‘Nino-kun likes it!’ She’s so persistent.”
Faking a grumble, Sho then heard Nino laugh. “I have eaten this morning, Sho-kun. Besides, the sun looks like it’s getting higher even though the air seems damp. Is it nearing lunch?”
Sho was impressed at him, “You can tell that much? I’m proud of you, Nino.”
Nino didn’t look delighted by the compliment Sho just uttered. He didn’t think it was worth it if Ohno isn’t here by his side. To cover his gloomy thought, he only nudged Sho by his ribs and said, “I’m just glad I’m healthy enough to taste and even finish Yumi-chan’s melon pans.”
“Well you get my point. Come on, Aiba-chan is also waiting for us.” Nino hid his small smile in his palm.
“Yumi-chan is the most modest girl I know. Whoa, sensei. Don’t stare at me like that. You know where my heart belongs to.” Nino laughed at Sho’s reaction. Sho pouted yet he didn’t hide his excitement by grinning while gripping Nino’s hand tighter. “Where will we go this time?”
Nino supposed they would go to the cafeteria. Instead, Nino sensed the damp air also the wetness tickling his legs, which barely seeped through his jeans. It was a bit slippery here so he assumed they were now walking above the grass.
“Come here,” Sho helped him to sit down. He carefully jogged down then found a mat splayed above the damp grass. He sensed another presence around them. He should have known that it was Aiba but he was not sure, this person was too quiet. The usual Aiba would wave his hand and call out his name even when he was still some meters apart. The cologne this man wore was somehow different from Aiba’s usual only made Nino worried whether it was someone he knew. Was it Jun?
“Yo, Nino.” Finally, he could see the beam through the greeting’s tone. It was Aiba after all.
“Did you change your cologne or something? Or is it possible that you downed the liquid that you became this quiet?” Instead of hearing any reply, he winced as a flying hand fell right to the back of his head. “H..hurts.”
“Can’t you be a bit nice to one of your fairies?” Sho and Aiba’s cackles rang around him. Nino was just too shy to admit that Aiba as one of his helpers. Aiba smelled like Jun this morning, he almost got insecure by himself because he couldn’t recognize his own best friend but hurriedly replaced it with his positive thought that perhaps Aiba spent time with Jun last night. Who knows.
“You really smell like Jun. I couldn’t identify you.” Sho side-glanced at Aiba who seemed to have the need to explain.
“I had a drink with him last night. I’ve asked Sho-chan to come too, but you know where he was.”
Without being reminded, Sho nodded in agreement. Last night was a night he didn’t want to experience anymore. He accompanied Nino last night as the younger man insisted not to go back and stay a bit longer at the hospital. While Sho thought of more about medication, there were two redden spot in both of Nino’s cheeks, “I’m sorry, I guess I needed Sho-chan more last night.”
“It’s really fine, Nino-chan.” Aiba patted Nino’s back before ruffling his hair, which only made Nino pissed off which then created a soft laugh from Sho.
“Enough kids. We should finish this melon pan. I don’t want to go back home this evening with remaining bread crumbs and receive a glare from Yumi.”
It was a usual sight, them gathering like this. They usually met at the cafeteria, sometimes on the rooftop or sometimes under the tree behind the hospital. Nino was glad to have them fill his days. At least, he wasn’t left behind. Despite his lack of ability, his friends were always there to guide him. He sometimes assumed it the other way, that they only pitied him for losing his sight and because he almost lost the one who was so dear to him. Either way, Nino was grateful now because none of them was true. They were here because they care, they were also Ohno’s friend so it was just normal for them to worry.
As Nino munched on his last bite, Sho cleared his throat. “Actually,” he paused for a good moment. Even though Nino couldn’t see him, he sensed the glance Sho threw toward him. Sho had his intense stare directed at Nino right now. Nino felt somewhat nervous. He didn’t look for a water but it was Aiba who genuinely offered him a glass. After he finished, Sho obliged to continue, “There is a remark saying that the medication for Ohno-kun should be stopped.”
At that very moment, Nino opted to be deaf. He didn’t want to hear any of this. The bread on his hand fell to the mat, left uneaten and ignored. In a second, Nino went frantic, screaming ‘It can’t be. No, Don’t.’ and any other objection. Aiba was there to embrace him, to pull Nino together, to try to calm him down. Like hell he could be calmed. Ohno was still breathing. Even though he hadn’t given any response yet, Nino was sure Ohno would wake up someday. He...they just needed to wait for that time to happen. All they need was to have faith on Ohno.
“Nino, listen. It’s not an easy option for me either. Nor for anyone. We love Ohno-kun. But can’t you really see him dying slowly like that? Isn’t it better to set him free?” Sho defended himself, if Nino was able to notice the tremble in Sho’s voice, he surely opted to ignore it.
“THEN YOU SHOULD KILL ME TOO, SHO! DO YOU THINK I CAN LIVE WITHOUT SATOSHI? SHO YOU SHOULDN’T BE JOKING LIKE THIS!” Nino’s outburst was so unstoppable. Tears kept streaming down his cheeks. His heart was pierced. His own friend wanted his fiancé to end his life. Every pain came at him all over again. How come Sho even thought about it? He understood Nino well, right? They’ve known each other well for more than a decade. Which part of it Sho didn’t understand? Nino really couldn’t think straight. All he wanted now is to go back to Ohno’s side and never leave him. He wouldn’t let anyone to remove any tube nor wires from Ohno’s body.
“No, Sho. You can’t. Y...you can’t take Satoshi away from me.” Nino’s energy left him all at once. His limp body rested in Aiba’s embrace. His world seemed darker than it usually looked. He selfishly tried to stand up only to be caught by Aiba. He really had no more strength even to stand on his own feet. Even so, he needed to go back. Ohno needed him. He really needed to be by Ohno’s side right at this moment. “P...please take me back, Masaki. Please.”
Nino didn’t catch the pained look on both Aiba and Sho’s faces. It surely hurt them too but it hurt more if they know that Ohno was still fighting and in pain that’s why a part of them wanted to stop Ohno’s effort. Nino was sure Ohno wanted to wake up. They just needed patience to wait for him. Perhaps Ohno wasn’t ready yet to wake up. He might be dreaming about fishing right now and didn’t want anyone to bother him. Nino kept thinking about any positive thought inside his head. Anything but seeing Ohno dying slowly without any medical support.
Truth to be told, Aiba had agreed with Sho to tell this matter to Nino. Aiba also had talked about this to Jun. He had been crying all night in Jun’s apartment. He actually wanted to barge into Nino’s apartment, to hug the smaller man keeping him in his embrace. However, things wouldn’t be that easy, he couldn’t do that. It would be too suspicious and it would only worry Nino.
“Nino, look,” Sho was still trying to convince him, which only earned him a glare from Nino, “They say Ohno’s retina is fit with yours. You can see again, Nino.” Nino couldn’t see that streams of tears also on Sho’s cheek. The doctor bit his lips to hide the tremble in his voice reached Nino’s ear.
Sho’s statement really pained him nonetheless. There was nothing calming or pleasant at all about this new discovery. He couldn’t understand anymore why Sho even thought that Nino would be happy to have Ohno’s eyes for him to see light again in exchange for Ohno’s life. Sho should have known Nino would never agree to anything like this. “Enough, Sho. Please just stop before I truly hate you which I almost do.”
“Nino...”
“No, Masaki, not you too. J...just please help me back.” Nino desperately clung onto Aiba’s shirt, begging the older man to take him away from this place to be close to Ohno.
“Yes,” As Aiba helped him to stand up, he felt the moisture on his arm. It was not his tears. It was Aiba’s. However, he chose to not care. All he could think of was Ohno and Ohno only, even though he heard a sob after he retreated from their ‘picnic’ place.
“Satoshi can’t leave me, he can’t leave me, Masaki.” In between Nino’s sobs, Masaki hugged him so tight. Nino couldn’t tell which one crushed him more, the reality or Aiba’s hug.
***
Sho walked back to his ward, his shoulder slumped, his sight blurred. To hear a final decision from the team doctor who was handling Ohno’s treatment was a hit for him. Despite his job, Ohno was his best friend. He noticed the same response from Ohno every single day. However, everything progressed slowly, even some days didn’t have progress at all. Sometimes, Ohno didn’t even react to any order Sho was giving him medically. Even so, Sho was sure Ohno was struggling in spite of his low condition.
He couldn’t neglect the fact that in Ohno’s case, he let his subjective decision overpower him. He never doubted his capability; he read many books, also had experience in many cases. But Ohno’s case was new and he knew he couldn’t be alone to solve this. That was why he agreed when the director suggested to make a team. He lost 3 to 1. His opinion was objected in their last meeting. Ohno has been incapable if not for the machine which supported him. Ohno’s life was so dependent on those tubes and cables. They have waited for a month, yet they haven’t gained any positive result. It always went static as it is.
To be frank, for these past two weeks Ohno’s condition went worse. Sho never told Nino. He didn’t want to make the younger man suffer more than he already does. Sometimes, after Nino left in the evening, Ohno’s condition would degrade. Ohno’s health scale showed almost to 1 point. The same thing happened last night, it was when Nino begged to stay because Ohno’s condition got worse. He seemed to be having a hard time breathing even though he had been supported by medical equipment. Nino was afraid Ohno would leave him that night.
Sho knew it was getting serious and he needed to take an action although it pierced him so much. Even so, he had to be professional. He was Ohno’s doctor after all. Thus, this decision was the best thing he could offer. He assumed Ohno should be wanting Nino to see again. At least by using Ohno’s retina, there was something Ohno could leave for Nino.
Sho relearned Ohno’s condition when he arrived on his desk. His trembling hands didn’t stop him to pile the folder he needed to reanalyze, hoping he could find something that could at least prevent them from losing Ohno. He also never stopped praying looking for any miracle to come and save Ohno.
***
True to his words, Nino never moved from his place. Aiba has offered him lunch even dinner, yet as stubborn as the younger man could be, he only shook his head. His position also didn’t change from the last time Aiba left him at noon, his body leaning against Ohno’s, one hand tangled with Ohno’s good one, the other one rests on top of Ohno’s chest. Nino assured himself that Ohno is breathing, ignoring the machine which was still beeping by Ohno’s left side.
“Nino-chan, visiting hours are over. We should go back. Sho-chan will look after Ohchan.” At the mention of Sho’s name, Aiba could see Nino’s grip on Ohno’s hand tightened. “Sho-chan won’t do anything bad. He will take care of Ohchan well.”
“Why am I not in his place, Masaki? If I can’t see a thing, why am I still alive? What’s the point of me living here without any light? If Satoshi really can’t bear it, he should tell me that. He can’t leave anywhere without me. I would hate him forever, I would kick his ass so hard when we meet in heaven. Satoshi can never leave me, Masaki.”
“Nino...”
“Why do I have to live?” Even though Nino couldn’t locate him, the stare Nino gave him pierced through his heart. Aiba caught Nino into another embrace, sobbing hard into Nino’s shoulder, apologizing.
“Because Ohchan needs you, Nino. Ohchan needs you to be strong, to be there for him when he wakes up. And I need you to give me your snarky comments. Jun needs you to fight with him. Sho needs you to pull himself together from his uptight schedule. We all need you.”
“Then they shouldn’t offer me that nonsense thing, Aiba-chan. Are they heartless or something? I’m sure Ohchan still wants to live. He can’t leave me yet.” Nino’s eyes were again filled with tears, salty drops fell to his chin, drenching Ohno’s bed and his shirt. “Can I bring Satoshi home?” Nino exclaimed all of sudden. He was facing Ohno and caressing Ohno’s cheek as if Ohno would feel his sorrow.
Aiba was stunned at Nino’s statement. His knees gave up and he felt ashamed of himself for agreeing with the decision Sho and the others had made for Ohno. Looking at the desperate guy in front of him questioningly, he made sure of what he just heard. “Are you sure, Nino?”
“Can you ask Sho to install the machine at our house? I’ll take care of him. He doesn’t have to worry about anything. I’ll ask my grandfather’s help to set everything. It will be better if I were always near Satoshi. He may be more relaxed if it were in his own house.”
“I..I’ll try to ask him.” Aiba stammered before vanishing out of Nino’s sight.
After making sure Aiba had left the room, Nino mumbled to Ohno, “We’re going home, Ohchan.”
***
“Kazu, are you ready?”
“Are we supposed to leave now? I thought we’re going in the evening.” Nino came out from their bedroom still with tousled hair and his loosened shirt which showed off his shoulder blades and made him look like a kid who wore his father’s shirt.
“I think I told you that we’re dropping by my mom’s house first then we’re off to go?”
As if something just hit Nino hard, he ran to the bathroom in a flash. Nino remembered Ohno murmur something when the older man blew him off last night. Of course it was hard to remember what Ohno was saying since his concentration was split. “Why don’t you remind me? Mina-nee will tease me again if we don’t hurry.”
Upon seeing Nino’s reaction, Ohno just chuckled and continued preparing the things he needed today. Today was going to be a special day for them. They were planning to celebrate their anniversary by having a dinner in a place Ohno has reserved the other day. It’s been 8 years since they started dating and Ohno was sure his decision was right. The first thing he needed was his and Nino’s family’s approval. He had called Nino’s mother the other day that they were going to visit their home today. However Ohno said the other way around. Instead of going to Nino’s family house, Ohno said they were going to his. It was all to make Nino surprised. He actually had received and even got support from his parents and sister. The thing left now was only from Nino’s family side. Ohno felt his heart thumping faster than usual. It gave him positive spark inside his ribcage. He felt like someone is playing firecrackers inside his heart. He was excited yet afraid if this wouldn’t work well.
“Why did you mark me so much? Am I your new living canvas now? I almost didn’t recognize my own body on the mirror. You’re such a-,“ Nino’s complaint was stopped by a sudden kiss which made his words fell, forgotten at the back of his head. As always, Ohno’s kiss always felt like a firework, it caught him by surprise but made him sparked and delighted. It was also gentle and warm at the same time. And Nino wanted to freeze this time as he circled his hands to Ohno’s neck.
“Well I couldn’t help it. My body moves naturally when it comes to you. Come on.” Ohno left Nino speechless. He marched towards the front door without looking back because he knew Nino would follow after all.
When they arrived at their destination Nino made a questioning look at Ohno. He should have noticed it when he drove his way to this place. Ohno on the other hand only shrugged his shoulder as if he knew nothing though he’s the one plotting this plan. “It won’t hurt us if the route was a bit different, yes? Besides it seems your mom has cooked our favorite kare.”
Nino still sat on the driver seat giving Ohno his side eyes. “Oh come on, Kazu. We agreed that your mom’s food is the best, right?”
“Are you sure you are only thinking about your stomach? You’re too suspicious, Ohchan.”
“And I love you so much, my Kazunari. Let’s get out. Don’t make my parents-in-law wait too long.”
“Is there something you know that I don’t?” Nino still had his curiosity when they walked toward Nino’s family living room. Ohno’s grin spread across his face as if he just won lottery. He was too distrustful, Nino thought.
“Good afternoon, Satoshi. Hey there Kazu.” Before Nino received any reply, he was crushed in his mother’s embrace. It felt so long even though they just met last month. “Hi mom.”
After giving his son a proper hug, Nino’s mom hugged Satoshi. “You two are too thin. Don’t you guys feed each other?”
“Can’t you see Satoshi’s cheeks, mom? All of his food goes there, it’s just stuck there and the rest he used it for his energy for fishing. And I’m already like this since long ago.” Nino’s sharp tongue surely came from his mother. His mother only laughed hearing Nino’s snarky response.
“Come in, kids. I have made a bunch of food to make you full.”
As what Ohno said previously, they were here to eat Nino’s mom kare. Ohno couldn’t stop saying ‘Yummy’ even with his mouth full of food. Nino was just glad the carrot or even the chicken didn’t fly out of Ohno’s mouth. They ended up eating two and a half plates of Kare because it was truly delicious and they remembered they haven’t eaten anything last night because they had something else related to their south-body-area to do.
After Nino helped his mom clean the table, he looked for Ohno. His sister said Ohno was with his parents in their washitsu. It was strange as that room was barely used unless there was something formal to do. They usually just lounged in their living room so why did they need to use washitsu? Did Ohno want more time to spend with Nino’s parents?
When Nino slid open the paper’s door, he came to sit by Ohno’s side. He had no idea why there was this heavy aura in this room. It wasn’t intimidating yet it felt a bit nerve-wracking. Ohno also sat in seiza while his mother and father sat across him. So he thought there must be something serious happening here.
“Please let me take care of Kazunari from now on.”
Nino jerked his head. This formality was new for Nino. Their family knew he was dating Ohno even without this formal announcement. They already understood and accepted Ohno as his boyfriend and the one he’s living with. He was glad that no one questioned his sexual preference. But what was happening right now was new to him. He didn’t understand why Ohno had to be this formal with his family.
“I’m planning to take Kazunari under my name and I promise to take care of him for the rest of my life. I am going to make your son happy and fulfilled. I will love him and I will always treasure him.”
Nino got more surprised by the speech Ohno uttered, he lost his words. And when Ohno took his hand, he didn’t even realize Ohno was shaking in nervousness. Nino didn’t hear any reply from his mom but then he saw Ohno was hugged so tightly by his mom once Ohno stopped talking. His father also patted Ohno’s shoulder as approval. Everyone seemed to lose their words after hearing Ohno’s brave proposal.
Even after they left Nino’s parent’s house, Nino didn’t stop staring at Ohno. “Ohno Satoshi, you are the most insane man I’ve ever met. How come you plot this thing behind my back? Oh my god, stop grinning that was too shining.”
“I just feel the need to state it out. To show you how serious I am with you. I don’t want to make myself regret, Kazu.” The genuine eyes Ohno showed to him just made his heart melted. He swore no one could make himself like this but Ohno. This sleepy man could never look convincing but look at him now. He was the most adorable man Nino could be proud of.
Nino looked down to his left hand where Ohno put on a ring to his finger. It was as bright as Ohno’s smile. Nothing could make him happier right now. “Thank you, Satoshi.”
“My pleasure, fiancé.”
When Nino drove them back home, he was too happy. He latched his hands with Ohno time to time. Nino grinned like an idiot when Ohno sang along with the song on the radio they were currently listening. It was Love On Top, one of Ohno’s favorite songs which always made Nino laugh when Ohno sang it with his high pitched voice.
When it was still green, suddenly there was a boy running for his toy. Nino couldn’t control his brakes. He untangled his hand from Ohno and gripped the steering wheel so tight. He naturally turned their car to the side and everything went too fast. The ring’s brightness blinded him. Ohno’s screams sounded like a muffle to him. In a second, he lost his consciousness.
~
Nino woke up with stiff limbs. He fell asleep beside Ohno’s bed. He couldn’t believe he dreamed of that dreadful event. He was so afraid the first time he woke up after the incident where he couldn’t find Ohno by his side. His hand was trembling so badly and he couldn’t see a thing. Even when he screamed out for light, nothing came to his view. His mom was there to pull himself together. And when he found out where Ohno was, he got himself unconscious again. That was too much for him. He couldn’t handle the shock all at once. But now, his hand still latched with Ohno’s. He was tougher now. He knew he should be. And he was glad he could make it passed.
That night after the talk with Sho, he refused to go home. Sho allowed him to stay the night with one condition which was for him to take his dinner. Even though Nino had recovered physically, he was still emotionally unstable. His great sorrow could make him weak. Sho was afraid Nino would fall ill too. That was why he needed Nino to fill energy for himself.
Nino’s request to bring Ohno home seemed to be approved by the doctors which was now being processed. Sho finally agreed to this and would be Ohno’s personal doctor who would devote his utmost care to Ohno. He also asked nurse Aoi to help Nino at his apartment, just in case something happened when Sho wasn’t around them.
***
One week after Ohno was discharged from the hospital his condition seemed to be better. Sho thought it might because the miracle they have asked for. Even though Ohno’s response was still in abnormal, he was breathing fine. Sho even said there was an improvement in Ohno’s motor response. Perhaps it was best to bring Ohno home to make him feel the change of the atmosphere.
Sho informed Nino to always talk to Ohno. He said it was good to stimulate Ohno’s response. They said people in comatose actually noticed when they were being talked to even under their unconsciousness. That was why he always chatted to Ohno about anything he had in his mind. Whether it was about the first time they met, their first date, their first break up, even their first sex. Nino also often sang for him. He wanted to touch his piano again but he was too afraid to leave Ohno’s side. Even when there was Aoi who would watch over them every day, Nino just couldn’t leave Ohno. He was afraid that someday, Ohno might wake up and he wasn’t by his side. The thought was quite much terrifying. He didn’t want Ohno to experience the same shock as him. Therefore, instead of playing his piano, he loved to play his recorded songs.
On one bright day after the downpour, Nino as usual sang their favorite song. He also played a guitar next to Ohno. In the middle of the song, Nino didn’t notice his tears had streamed down. He stopped for a while sobbing next to Ohno. He might have been imagining things but he felt Ohno’s hand moved for a bit. “Ka..Kaz..”
“Ohchan? Satoshi?? Oh god, Satoshi, I’m here.” Nino pushed the button above Ohno’s bed which worked as an alarm that could notify Sho and even Jun who lived next door. Aoi who also noticed this, immediately called for help before he checked on Ohno’s condition. After some minutes, Jun barged into their apartment with a trailing Sho. Jun pulled Nino apart to let Sho examined Ohno.
“Ohno-kun, can you hear me?”
“Kaz.. Kazu” Nino immediately rushed to Ohno’s side, holding his hand while Sho was still examining Ohno’s condition.
“Keep talking to him, Nino.”
Nino did as he was told. Ohno finally woke up. He didn’t want to waste this time. He caressed Ohno’s hand while kept talking to him.
Sho hugged Nino after he finished examined Ohno who was now breathing calmly. Sho also had removed some tubes from Ohno’s body. Though some were still there but Ohno was more calming without too much equipment around his body. “Thank you, Nino. Now we can only wait until he wakes up again. I’m sure this time he’s going to fully wake up. His body will feel sore but I’m here to help him.”
“Yes, thank you Sho-chan.”
***
The first time Ohno regained his full consciousness, he finally could response to almost everything Sho asked him even to lift his arm. However, no one dared to inform Ohno about Nino’s blindness. Nino was also still tight lipped at this. He didn’t want to worry Ohno yet. He would know it when the time is right.
“I missed you, old man.”
“Y..our fa..ce i..s a mes.s, Kaz.” Ohno was still struggling to find his words. Sho said it was normal as he was still recovering.
“I was so much a mess, Ohchan.” Nino smiled genuinely sweet which could radiate warmness to Ohno.
“My pre..tty Ka.zun..ari.”
“Sshh.. just be quiet and hurry recover. You owe me lots of things, Satoshi.” As Nino kissed Ohno’s forehead, Ohno back to lull into his relaxing dream.
***
When they removed all the support equipment from Ohno, it was when Ohno could move some parts of his body and even could notice something was off about Nino.
“Did something happen to you?” Nino didn’t catch the meaning of Ohno’s question. He felt fine and nothing went wrong. But Ohno could see him well.
“I’m fine, Ohchan. Do you need anything?”
“No, Nino. I mean, I know I miss a lot of things but you are just different.”
“I am still the same person who loves you and ready to beat the world only for you to get back to me again.”
“No, really. Are you hiding anything? Look at me, Nino. You can see me, right?”
Nino beamed at him as nothing of Ohno’s question bothered him even a bit, “Of course Ohchan, with all of my heart.”
“Nino, don’t trick me. Tell me something is wrong. I can sense it.”
“What do you think then?” Nino stood up, he hovered above Ohno, and half of his body was now almost covering Ohno. He then caressed Ohno’s cheek. He felt every inch of Ohno face, feeling it alive under his touch. His jaw, his lips, his nose, his eyes, everything felt so live, Nino was grateful. He planted a soft kiss on Ohno’s forehead until Ohno reached for him so that they were staring at each other eye to eye. Nino could sense it, he searched it in his memories how pretty Ohno’s eyes were, they were like his favourite hot chocolate on winter days that could wrap him around like a blanket, engulfed him in its warmth and made him felt so home. Those brown eyes often made him in love again and again. He pretended to see those eyes and how longed he was to see them. Without him realizing it, his tears spilled without notice in front of Ohno.
“You can’t see me, right? Nino, you are losing your sight. Am I right?” Instead of an answer, Nino sobbed by Ohno’s side. He almost lost his composure again. Not like this, not when he supposed to be strong in front of Ohno. After all, he couldn’t lie to Ohno.
Ohno pulled Nino into his embrace, let Nino’s shuddering body crushed him. It must be hard for Nino for these past few months. He could feel all the struggle and restraint Nino had done wore off. Even though Ohno still couldn’t do much, he swore he would be better soon to support Nino, to settle everything up so that every of Nino’s doing wouldn’t be wasted. “It’s fine now. You have me now, Kazu. We’re in this together. I’m sorry for leaving you too long. I won’t go anywhere again. I swear.”
***
It was nearing Nino’s birthday when Sho barged into their apartment. Ohno now could sit by himself. Even with a little support from Nino, he almost could do everything independently. This was a big improvement for them. Sho was glad that the improvement was fast. “Guys, I have a good news.”
“It would be great if you can sit down first and talk about this good news calmly, Sho-kun.” Jun who was preparing their dinner interrupted Sho’s good vibes. The doctor grinned from head to toe as if he was a kid who just received praise from his parents.
“Jun-kun is right. You’d better sit here and let’s enjoy his pasta. It’s been a while since we gathered like this.” Aiba followed after Jun while serving them the wine he brought this noon.
“And more importantly before the old man beside me eats up all of this delicious pasta.” Nino’s retort earned him a pinch from Ohno, but they were laughing from this old couple’s antic.
Sho agreed to sit beside Aiba and laughed with them. He was glad everything was almost back to normal.
“Umm.. so good!” Both Sho and Ohno exclaimed it together and Jun’s cheek were spotting two red color on each side while he mumbling ‘thank you’.
When they were almost finished, Aiba brought back the unfinished conversation about the thing Sho was about to announce before they dug in. “So what kind of good news you have, Sho-chan?”
Sho downed his wine in one go which almost made him choked. “Right. I got a news that we found Nino a pair of retinas. They are going to come this weekend and I hope Nino would come with me tomorrow to have some medical check-up.”
This good news made everyone in Ohno and Nino’s dining room cheered with the wine they had now. Nino got himself shake a bit. He almost couldn’t believe this was happening. Almost a year earlier, he had lost his hope but now everything would back to normal. If this were a dream he really didn’t want to be woken up. Ohno held his hand tight. The warmth seeped through his skin into his bone, this was real. And the brown eyes he longed to see was going to greet him. He was feeling so grateful. “Thank you guys, thank you.”
***
Some months later..
“..I vow to be faithful in sickness and in health, during times of want and plenty. I will treasure and care for you as we both shall live.”
“So Ninomiya Kazunari, will you take Ohno Satoshi as your lawfully wedded husband?”
Nino couldn’t stop his tears right now. Ohno looked so bright in front of him. His white suit looked beautifully in contrast with his skin tone. But that was what he loved from his future husband. He finally could see the blooming smile from the man he loved so much. The man who’s going to be with him from now and ever. “I do.”
Then everyone around them cheered in pleasure while the couple sealing their vow with a kiss. They would continue to live their life happily and would treasure every single moment.
~End
Some notes :
*GCS : The Glasgow coma scale is a neurological scale which aims to give a reliable and objective way of recording the conscious state of a person for initial as well as subsequent assessment.
*Washitsu : Japanese term for a room in a house or apartment that has traditional tatami flooring.
*Seiza : Japanese term for one of the traditional formal ways of sitting in Japan.
icecreamsukiFrom: :3.
Title: Alive A Life
Pairing/Focus: Nino/Ohno
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 7100
Warnings: Angst
Summary: On their 8th anniversary, Ohno went to Nino’s house to ask for Nino’s parent’s approval to marry him. It was the happiest day for Nino. He couldn’t stop looking at the ring from Ohno. When Nino drove them back home, he was too happy. He latched his hands with Ohno from time to time. When it was still green, there’s a boy running for his toy. Nino couldn’t control his brakes. Somehow, the ring’s brightness blinded him.
Notes: Hi icecreamsuki-san, it’s a pleasure writing for your prompt. I took the ‘angst’. So I hope this fic could be welcomed :)). There is some medical notes in this fic, I am not working with any medical stuff or such. But I hope it’s fine and fit in this fic.
Thank you so much for bb J for being a beta reader for this fic. Thank you for bb Z, I senpai, S neechan <3
And a lot of thanks to nino mod <333
Title taken from Kamen Rider Ryuki’s OST.
Another day in another season; this time, the flower stopped blooming. Some leaves changed its colors, some travelled away through the wind. The world kept moving nevertheless. He was still breathing, his heart was still thumping. He was alive, one of the biggest reasons that kept him going. Morning fragrance with dew damping the surface and moist air around him refreshed him. The sun would soon erase all the humidity. It would warm him and assured him that he could carry on through the day.
Nino greeted some people he passed along the hallway. It was a routine for him to say ‘good morning’ and bow to the people he met. The people here were nice to him. They have known him well as he often spent his time around here. What he loved most was the special garden he could pass before he reached his destination. The garden always gave nice fragrance from its well-kept flowerbeds. The lively nuance made him more confident and have more faith. As he recognized the sun has raised, he walked confidently to his usual place. The bright sun was also another thing that always reassured him. The brightness in his vision led him to walk assertively although once in a while he held tighter to his stick.
“Morning,” He opened the door by heart. Everything in this room was neat and organized. It helped him not stumble along the way. Even though these four walls were actually threatening, it made him less worried as they support Ohno well in this room. He was actually disappointed when Sho mentioned that he couldn’t bring anything to this room. He couldn’t bring Ohno’s favorite flower to make the scent around the room be fresher. All he could smell was disinfectant around Ohno.
He lurched forward without any difficulties as he was used to this room, and also because of how spacey the room was. He could move around without bumping into anything, but even if he did, there wasn’t anything that could harm him. Besides, most people here were a great help to him. Nino loved to call them fairies. They were all kind-hearted; taking care of him, helping him and were always by his side even without him saying anything. There were times when he couldn’t utter anything out of distress, when he needed someone to lean on but he just couldn’t say it. Magically, anyone would come to him and soothe him. This kind of attention made him thankful despite the uncertain condition he was currently having. Some elders even claimed him as their grandson, some even wanted him as their son-in-law. He always rejected them politely, saying he didn’t need it as he was happily engaged to his partner. It warmed his heart to know that people loved him as much as he loved them.
As he found his comfortable spot, he sat by the bed next to Ohno’s sleeping figure. His hand searched for the other’s long fingers. They were soft and warm. Those long fingers and bigger palm also always made him feel secure. The warmth, which spread through the open palm, appeased him whenever he clasped it with his. Leaving their hands tangled, he began his monologue.
“Hey Satoshi, your hand is getting softer these days. It’s really not fair.” Nino pouted as he stared ahead. He placed the said hand on his cheek before he started again, “You know what, I’m playing piano again. Today’s song is one of your favorites. The Beatles one. The one you urged me to compose to a sheet music. Surprisingly I composed it with so much ease last night. Aside of my nonstop tears, I noticed that I finished the sheet in less than an hour. You must praise me or I’ll be so sad. Also I have a good news to tell, Yuki-chan is going to have another baby. She surely goes out so often. It seems she’s getting more beautiful, every male cat around our neighborhood really loves her. You really should see them. She’s surrounded by male cats every time I see her in the evening. She still accompanies me and dutifully finishes her dinner. But you know what, she acts like a queen these days. But well since she’s so pretty, it really can’t be helped. Even Aiba-chan said, ‘if Ohno-kun doesn’t wake up very soon, I’ll snatch Yuki-chan.’ He already declared that he would like to take Yuki-chan away. Also you know what, this is the most important one, Jun-kun has come back. He moved to the apartment next to ours last month.” He stopped for a moment, swallowing the invisible lump, which then only made his throat dry. “Last month, Ohchan. Jun-kun said he would like to accompany me though I said I already have Yuki-chan with me every night. Jun didn’t mean to snatch me away, but I think he has a plan. You still remember Jun-kun almost confessed to me back then, yes? Just like what Aiba-chan said, if you don’t wake up soon. Jun-kun will..” He choked. He couldn’t carry on because it’s getting too much. His previous wound seemed to open once more. Although he was physically fine now, he sometimes felt the sting in his body. Aoi said it was just his trauma. He should be better if he didn’t focus on the past event.
Before the accident, he used to hate the sun. He said it would only make him burnt. He said the sun was somehow harming him, not cooperating with him well, making Ohno tanner. Sunlight often made his vision too bright. That was why he preferred being under a dim light, or worse, in a dark place. He was fine with a lamp; at least it wouldn’t crash his skin. But now, under any kind of light, it helped him know that he was alive. The light also often guided him to reach Ohno’s hand like this. Thus, he understood he shouldn’t complain anymore.
His life turned out to be a bit confusing recently. He tried his best to manage it nevertheless. Thanks again to those fairies that have helped him. They never took their attention away from him. He was not giving up because he was sure that everything would be back to normal. He would laugh with Ohno again, hold his hand, walk by his side, and even play and sing in front of his grand piano again. He was sure of it.
Nino didn’t bother to hide his tears when someone approached him. “They say there will be downpour today even though the sun is so bright outside. Did you bring your coat?”
Sho didn’t wait for his answer. He checked on Ohno’s condition just like he usually did every morning. He didn’t trust anyone but himself. That was why he always made sure it was him who checked Ohno every day.
“GCS* is around 4. Thank you, Ohno-kun.” Sho meant to whisper, but often he would blurt it out where Nino could hear. Nino recognized what it was about but pretended not to hear it. Aoi told him that GCS was something to measure one person’s condition in comatose. Nino didn’t want to know about this. He only needed Ohno to open his eyes, to take him in his arms once more.
This morning view was actually the most heartbreaking thing for Sho. He hoped his decision was right and the news he was about to tell Nino wouldn’t make the younger man hate him. He glanced at Nino’s figure who obediently waited for Sho to finish. Their tangled hands clasped tight as if it was meant to be that way since the beginning. After 10 minutes of checking the necessities, he led Nino out of the room.
“I’ll be back,” Nino whispered close to Ohno’s ear before he stood up and left. The ward was now bright enough for Nino, he could tell by the light which came in through his vision.
“Have you had your breakfast? I hope you haven’t because Yumi baked too much melon pan again. She said, ‘Nino-kun likes it!’ She’s so persistent.”
Faking a grumble, Sho then heard Nino laugh. “I have eaten this morning, Sho-kun. Besides, the sun looks like it’s getting higher even though the air seems damp. Is it nearing lunch?”
Sho was impressed at him, “You can tell that much? I’m proud of you, Nino.”
Nino didn’t look delighted by the compliment Sho just uttered. He didn’t think it was worth it if Ohno isn’t here by his side. To cover his gloomy thought, he only nudged Sho by his ribs and said, “I’m just glad I’m healthy enough to taste and even finish Yumi-chan’s melon pans.”
“Well you get my point. Come on, Aiba-chan is also waiting for us.” Nino hid his small smile in his palm.
“Yumi-chan is the most modest girl I know. Whoa, sensei. Don’t stare at me like that. You know where my heart belongs to.” Nino laughed at Sho’s reaction. Sho pouted yet he didn’t hide his excitement by grinning while gripping Nino’s hand tighter. “Where will we go this time?”
Nino supposed they would go to the cafeteria. Instead, Nino sensed the damp air also the wetness tickling his legs, which barely seeped through his jeans. It was a bit slippery here so he assumed they were now walking above the grass.
“Come here,” Sho helped him to sit down. He carefully jogged down then found a mat splayed above the damp grass. He sensed another presence around them. He should have known that it was Aiba but he was not sure, this person was too quiet. The usual Aiba would wave his hand and call out his name even when he was still some meters apart. The cologne this man wore was somehow different from Aiba’s usual only made Nino worried whether it was someone he knew. Was it Jun?
“Yo, Nino.” Finally, he could see the beam through the greeting’s tone. It was Aiba after all.
“Did you change your cologne or something? Or is it possible that you downed the liquid that you became this quiet?” Instead of hearing any reply, he winced as a flying hand fell right to the back of his head. “H..hurts.”
“Can’t you be a bit nice to one of your fairies?” Sho and Aiba’s cackles rang around him. Nino was just too shy to admit that Aiba as one of his helpers. Aiba smelled like Jun this morning, he almost got insecure by himself because he couldn’t recognize his own best friend but hurriedly replaced it with his positive thought that perhaps Aiba spent time with Jun last night. Who knows.
“You really smell like Jun. I couldn’t identify you.” Sho side-glanced at Aiba who seemed to have the need to explain.
“I had a drink with him last night. I’ve asked Sho-chan to come too, but you know where he was.”
Without being reminded, Sho nodded in agreement. Last night was a night he didn’t want to experience anymore. He accompanied Nino last night as the younger man insisted not to go back and stay a bit longer at the hospital. While Sho thought of more about medication, there were two redden spot in both of Nino’s cheeks, “I’m sorry, I guess I needed Sho-chan more last night.”
“It’s really fine, Nino-chan.” Aiba patted Nino’s back before ruffling his hair, which only made Nino pissed off which then created a soft laugh from Sho.
“Enough kids. We should finish this melon pan. I don’t want to go back home this evening with remaining bread crumbs and receive a glare from Yumi.”
It was a usual sight, them gathering like this. They usually met at the cafeteria, sometimes on the rooftop or sometimes under the tree behind the hospital. Nino was glad to have them fill his days. At least, he wasn’t left behind. Despite his lack of ability, his friends were always there to guide him. He sometimes assumed it the other way, that they only pitied him for losing his sight and because he almost lost the one who was so dear to him. Either way, Nino was grateful now because none of them was true. They were here because they care, they were also Ohno’s friend so it was just normal for them to worry.
As Nino munched on his last bite, Sho cleared his throat. “Actually,” he paused for a good moment. Even though Nino couldn’t see him, he sensed the glance Sho threw toward him. Sho had his intense stare directed at Nino right now. Nino felt somewhat nervous. He didn’t look for a water but it was Aiba who genuinely offered him a glass. After he finished, Sho obliged to continue, “There is a remark saying that the medication for Ohno-kun should be stopped.”
At that very moment, Nino opted to be deaf. He didn’t want to hear any of this. The bread on his hand fell to the mat, left uneaten and ignored. In a second, Nino went frantic, screaming ‘It can’t be. No, Don’t.’ and any other objection. Aiba was there to embrace him, to pull Nino together, to try to calm him down. Like hell he could be calmed. Ohno was still breathing. Even though he hadn’t given any response yet, Nino was sure Ohno would wake up someday. He...they just needed to wait for that time to happen. All they need was to have faith on Ohno.
“Nino, listen. It’s not an easy option for me either. Nor for anyone. We love Ohno-kun. But can’t you really see him dying slowly like that? Isn’t it better to set him free?” Sho defended himself, if Nino was able to notice the tremble in Sho’s voice, he surely opted to ignore it.
“THEN YOU SHOULD KILL ME TOO, SHO! DO YOU THINK I CAN LIVE WITHOUT SATOSHI? SHO YOU SHOULDN’T BE JOKING LIKE THIS!” Nino’s outburst was so unstoppable. Tears kept streaming down his cheeks. His heart was pierced. His own friend wanted his fiancé to end his life. Every pain came at him all over again. How come Sho even thought about it? He understood Nino well, right? They’ve known each other well for more than a decade. Which part of it Sho didn’t understand? Nino really couldn’t think straight. All he wanted now is to go back to Ohno’s side and never leave him. He wouldn’t let anyone to remove any tube nor wires from Ohno’s body.
“No, Sho. You can’t. Y...you can’t take Satoshi away from me.” Nino’s energy left him all at once. His limp body rested in Aiba’s embrace. His world seemed darker than it usually looked. He selfishly tried to stand up only to be caught by Aiba. He really had no more strength even to stand on his own feet. Even so, he needed to go back. Ohno needed him. He really needed to be by Ohno’s side right at this moment. “P...please take me back, Masaki. Please.”
Nino didn’t catch the pained look on both Aiba and Sho’s faces. It surely hurt them too but it hurt more if they know that Ohno was still fighting and in pain that’s why a part of them wanted to stop Ohno’s effort. Nino was sure Ohno wanted to wake up. They just needed patience to wait for him. Perhaps Ohno wasn’t ready yet to wake up. He might be dreaming about fishing right now and didn’t want anyone to bother him. Nino kept thinking about any positive thought inside his head. Anything but seeing Ohno dying slowly without any medical support.
Truth to be told, Aiba had agreed with Sho to tell this matter to Nino. Aiba also had talked about this to Jun. He had been crying all night in Jun’s apartment. He actually wanted to barge into Nino’s apartment, to hug the smaller man keeping him in his embrace. However, things wouldn’t be that easy, he couldn’t do that. It would be too suspicious and it would only worry Nino.
“Nino, look,” Sho was still trying to convince him, which only earned him a glare from Nino, “They say Ohno’s retina is fit with yours. You can see again, Nino.” Nino couldn’t see that streams of tears also on Sho’s cheek. The doctor bit his lips to hide the tremble in his voice reached Nino’s ear.
Sho’s statement really pained him nonetheless. There was nothing calming or pleasant at all about this new discovery. He couldn’t understand anymore why Sho even thought that Nino would be happy to have Ohno’s eyes for him to see light again in exchange for Ohno’s life. Sho should have known Nino would never agree to anything like this. “Enough, Sho. Please just stop before I truly hate you which I almost do.”
“Nino...”
“No, Masaki, not you too. J...just please help me back.” Nino desperately clung onto Aiba’s shirt, begging the older man to take him away from this place to be close to Ohno.
“Yes,” As Aiba helped him to stand up, he felt the moisture on his arm. It was not his tears. It was Aiba’s. However, he chose to not care. All he could think of was Ohno and Ohno only, even though he heard a sob after he retreated from their ‘picnic’ place.
“Satoshi can’t leave me, he can’t leave me, Masaki.” In between Nino’s sobs, Masaki hugged him so tight. Nino couldn’t tell which one crushed him more, the reality or Aiba’s hug.
Sho walked back to his ward, his shoulder slumped, his sight blurred. To hear a final decision from the team doctor who was handling Ohno’s treatment was a hit for him. Despite his job, Ohno was his best friend. He noticed the same response from Ohno every single day. However, everything progressed slowly, even some days didn’t have progress at all. Sometimes, Ohno didn’t even react to any order Sho was giving him medically. Even so, Sho was sure Ohno was struggling in spite of his low condition.
He couldn’t neglect the fact that in Ohno’s case, he let his subjective decision overpower him. He never doubted his capability; he read many books, also had experience in many cases. But Ohno’s case was new and he knew he couldn’t be alone to solve this. That was why he agreed when the director suggested to make a team. He lost 3 to 1. His opinion was objected in their last meeting. Ohno has been incapable if not for the machine which supported him. Ohno’s life was so dependent on those tubes and cables. They have waited for a month, yet they haven’t gained any positive result. It always went static as it is.
To be frank, for these past two weeks Ohno’s condition went worse. Sho never told Nino. He didn’t want to make the younger man suffer more than he already does. Sometimes, after Nino left in the evening, Ohno’s condition would degrade. Ohno’s health scale showed almost to 1 point. The same thing happened last night, it was when Nino begged to stay because Ohno’s condition got worse. He seemed to be having a hard time breathing even though he had been supported by medical equipment. Nino was afraid Ohno would leave him that night.
Sho knew it was getting serious and he needed to take an action although it pierced him so much. Even so, he had to be professional. He was Ohno’s doctor after all. Thus, this decision was the best thing he could offer. He assumed Ohno should be wanting Nino to see again. At least by using Ohno’s retina, there was something Ohno could leave for Nino.
Sho relearned Ohno’s condition when he arrived on his desk. His trembling hands didn’t stop him to pile the folder he needed to reanalyze, hoping he could find something that could at least prevent them from losing Ohno. He also never stopped praying looking for any miracle to come and save Ohno.
True to his words, Nino never moved from his place. Aiba has offered him lunch even dinner, yet as stubborn as the younger man could be, he only shook his head. His position also didn’t change from the last time Aiba left him at noon, his body leaning against Ohno’s, one hand tangled with Ohno’s good one, the other one rests on top of Ohno’s chest. Nino assured himself that Ohno is breathing, ignoring the machine which was still beeping by Ohno’s left side.
“Nino-chan, visiting hours are over. We should go back. Sho-chan will look after Ohchan.” At the mention of Sho’s name, Aiba could see Nino’s grip on Ohno’s hand tightened. “Sho-chan won’t do anything bad. He will take care of Ohchan well.”
“Why am I not in his place, Masaki? If I can’t see a thing, why am I still alive? What’s the point of me living here without any light? If Satoshi really can’t bear it, he should tell me that. He can’t leave anywhere without me. I would hate him forever, I would kick his ass so hard when we meet in heaven. Satoshi can never leave me, Masaki.”
“Nino...”
“Why do I have to live?” Even though Nino couldn’t locate him, the stare Nino gave him pierced through his heart. Aiba caught Nino into another embrace, sobbing hard into Nino’s shoulder, apologizing.
“Because Ohchan needs you, Nino. Ohchan needs you to be strong, to be there for him when he wakes up. And I need you to give me your snarky comments. Jun needs you to fight with him. Sho needs you to pull himself together from his uptight schedule. We all need you.”
“Then they shouldn’t offer me that nonsense thing, Aiba-chan. Are they heartless or something? I’m sure Ohchan still wants to live. He can’t leave me yet.” Nino’s eyes were again filled with tears, salty drops fell to his chin, drenching Ohno’s bed and his shirt. “Can I bring Satoshi home?” Nino exclaimed all of sudden. He was facing Ohno and caressing Ohno’s cheek as if Ohno would feel his sorrow.
Aiba was stunned at Nino’s statement. His knees gave up and he felt ashamed of himself for agreeing with the decision Sho and the others had made for Ohno. Looking at the desperate guy in front of him questioningly, he made sure of what he just heard. “Are you sure, Nino?”
“Can you ask Sho to install the machine at our house? I’ll take care of him. He doesn’t have to worry about anything. I’ll ask my grandfather’s help to set everything. It will be better if I were always near Satoshi. He may be more relaxed if it were in his own house.”
“I..I’ll try to ask him.” Aiba stammered before vanishing out of Nino’s sight.
After making sure Aiba had left the room, Nino mumbled to Ohno, “We’re going home, Ohchan.”
***
“Kazu, are you ready?”
“Are we supposed to leave now? I thought we’re going in the evening.” Nino came out from their bedroom still with tousled hair and his loosened shirt which showed off his shoulder blades and made him look like a kid who wore his father’s shirt.
“I think I told you that we’re dropping by my mom’s house first then we’re off to go?”
As if something just hit Nino hard, he ran to the bathroom in a flash. Nino remembered Ohno murmur something when the older man blew him off last night. Of course it was hard to remember what Ohno was saying since his concentration was split. “Why don’t you remind me? Mina-nee will tease me again if we don’t hurry.”
Upon seeing Nino’s reaction, Ohno just chuckled and continued preparing the things he needed today. Today was going to be a special day for them. They were planning to celebrate their anniversary by having a dinner in a place Ohno has reserved the other day. It’s been 8 years since they started dating and Ohno was sure his decision was right. The first thing he needed was his and Nino’s family’s approval. He had called Nino’s mother the other day that they were going to visit their home today. However Ohno said the other way around. Instead of going to Nino’s family house, Ohno said they were going to his. It was all to make Nino surprised. He actually had received and even got support from his parents and sister. The thing left now was only from Nino’s family side. Ohno felt his heart thumping faster than usual. It gave him positive spark inside his ribcage. He felt like someone is playing firecrackers inside his heart. He was excited yet afraid if this wouldn’t work well.
“Why did you mark me so much? Am I your new living canvas now? I almost didn’t recognize my own body on the mirror. You’re such a-,“ Nino’s complaint was stopped by a sudden kiss which made his words fell, forgotten at the back of his head. As always, Ohno’s kiss always felt like a firework, it caught him by surprise but made him sparked and delighted. It was also gentle and warm at the same time. And Nino wanted to freeze this time as he circled his hands to Ohno’s neck.
“Well I couldn’t help it. My body moves naturally when it comes to you. Come on.” Ohno left Nino speechless. He marched towards the front door without looking back because he knew Nino would follow after all.
When they arrived at their destination Nino made a questioning look at Ohno. He should have noticed it when he drove his way to this place. Ohno on the other hand only shrugged his shoulder as if he knew nothing though he’s the one plotting this plan. “It won’t hurt us if the route was a bit different, yes? Besides it seems your mom has cooked our favorite kare.”
Nino still sat on the driver seat giving Ohno his side eyes. “Oh come on, Kazu. We agreed that your mom’s food is the best, right?”
“Are you sure you are only thinking about your stomach? You’re too suspicious, Ohchan.”
“And I love you so much, my Kazunari. Let’s get out. Don’t make my parents-in-law wait too long.”
“Is there something you know that I don’t?” Nino still had his curiosity when they walked toward Nino’s family living room. Ohno’s grin spread across his face as if he just won lottery. He was too distrustful, Nino thought.
“Good afternoon, Satoshi. Hey there Kazu.” Before Nino received any reply, he was crushed in his mother’s embrace. It felt so long even though they just met last month. “Hi mom.”
After giving his son a proper hug, Nino’s mom hugged Satoshi. “You two are too thin. Don’t you guys feed each other?”
“Can’t you see Satoshi’s cheeks, mom? All of his food goes there, it’s just stuck there and the rest he used it for his energy for fishing. And I’m already like this since long ago.” Nino’s sharp tongue surely came from his mother. His mother only laughed hearing Nino’s snarky response.
“Come in, kids. I have made a bunch of food to make you full.”
As what Ohno said previously, they were here to eat Nino’s mom kare. Ohno couldn’t stop saying ‘Yummy’ even with his mouth full of food. Nino was just glad the carrot or even the chicken didn’t fly out of Ohno’s mouth. They ended up eating two and a half plates of Kare because it was truly delicious and they remembered they haven’t eaten anything last night because they had something else related to their south-body-area to do.
After Nino helped his mom clean the table, he looked for Ohno. His sister said Ohno was with his parents in their washitsu. It was strange as that room was barely used unless there was something formal to do. They usually just lounged in their living room so why did they need to use washitsu? Did Ohno want more time to spend with Nino’s parents?
When Nino slid open the paper’s door, he came to sit by Ohno’s side. He had no idea why there was this heavy aura in this room. It wasn’t intimidating yet it felt a bit nerve-wracking. Ohno also sat in seiza while his mother and father sat across him. So he thought there must be something serious happening here.
“Please let me take care of Kazunari from now on.”
Nino jerked his head. This formality was new for Nino. Their family knew he was dating Ohno even without this formal announcement. They already understood and accepted Ohno as his boyfriend and the one he’s living with. He was glad that no one questioned his sexual preference. But what was happening right now was new to him. He didn’t understand why Ohno had to be this formal with his family.
“I’m planning to take Kazunari under my name and I promise to take care of him for the rest of my life. I am going to make your son happy and fulfilled. I will love him and I will always treasure him.”
Nino got more surprised by the speech Ohno uttered, he lost his words. And when Ohno took his hand, he didn’t even realize Ohno was shaking in nervousness. Nino didn’t hear any reply from his mom but then he saw Ohno was hugged so tightly by his mom once Ohno stopped talking. His father also patted Ohno’s shoulder as approval. Everyone seemed to lose their words after hearing Ohno’s brave proposal.
Even after they left Nino’s parent’s house, Nino didn’t stop staring at Ohno. “Ohno Satoshi, you are the most insane man I’ve ever met. How come you plot this thing behind my back? Oh my god, stop grinning that was too shining.”
“I just feel the need to state it out. To show you how serious I am with you. I don’t want to make myself regret, Kazu.” The genuine eyes Ohno showed to him just made his heart melted. He swore no one could make himself like this but Ohno. This sleepy man could never look convincing but look at him now. He was the most adorable man Nino could be proud of.
Nino looked down to his left hand where Ohno put on a ring to his finger. It was as bright as Ohno’s smile. Nothing could make him happier right now. “Thank you, Satoshi.”
“My pleasure, fiancé.”
When Nino drove them back home, he was too happy. He latched his hands with Ohno time to time. Nino grinned like an idiot when Ohno sang along with the song on the radio they were currently listening. It was Love On Top, one of Ohno’s favorite songs which always made Nino laugh when Ohno sang it with his high pitched voice.
When it was still green, suddenly there was a boy running for his toy. Nino couldn’t control his brakes. He untangled his hand from Ohno and gripped the steering wheel so tight. He naturally turned their car to the side and everything went too fast. The ring’s brightness blinded him. Ohno’s screams sounded like a muffle to him. In a second, he lost his consciousness.
~
Nino woke up with stiff limbs. He fell asleep beside Ohno’s bed. He couldn’t believe he dreamed of that dreadful event. He was so afraid the first time he woke up after the incident where he couldn’t find Ohno by his side. His hand was trembling so badly and he couldn’t see a thing. Even when he screamed out for light, nothing came to his view. His mom was there to pull himself together. And when he found out where Ohno was, he got himself unconscious again. That was too much for him. He couldn’t handle the shock all at once. But now, his hand still latched with Ohno’s. He was tougher now. He knew he should be. And he was glad he could make it passed.
That night after the talk with Sho, he refused to go home. Sho allowed him to stay the night with one condition which was for him to take his dinner. Even though Nino had recovered physically, he was still emotionally unstable. His great sorrow could make him weak. Sho was afraid Nino would fall ill too. That was why he needed Nino to fill energy for himself.
Nino’s request to bring Ohno home seemed to be approved by the doctors which was now being processed. Sho finally agreed to this and would be Ohno’s personal doctor who would devote his utmost care to Ohno. He also asked nurse Aoi to help Nino at his apartment, just in case something happened when Sho wasn’t around them.
***
One week after Ohno was discharged from the hospital his condition seemed to be better. Sho thought it might because the miracle they have asked for. Even though Ohno’s response was still in abnormal, he was breathing fine. Sho even said there was an improvement in Ohno’s motor response. Perhaps it was best to bring Ohno home to make him feel the change of the atmosphere.
Sho informed Nino to always talk to Ohno. He said it was good to stimulate Ohno’s response. They said people in comatose actually noticed when they were being talked to even under their unconsciousness. That was why he always chatted to Ohno about anything he had in his mind. Whether it was about the first time they met, their first date, their first break up, even their first sex. Nino also often sang for him. He wanted to touch his piano again but he was too afraid to leave Ohno’s side. Even when there was Aoi who would watch over them every day, Nino just couldn’t leave Ohno. He was afraid that someday, Ohno might wake up and he wasn’t by his side. The thought was quite much terrifying. He didn’t want Ohno to experience the same shock as him. Therefore, instead of playing his piano, he loved to play his recorded songs.
On one bright day after the downpour, Nino as usual sang their favorite song. He also played a guitar next to Ohno. In the middle of the song, Nino didn’t notice his tears had streamed down. He stopped for a while sobbing next to Ohno. He might have been imagining things but he felt Ohno’s hand moved for a bit. “Ka..Kaz..”
“Ohchan? Satoshi?? Oh god, Satoshi, I’m here.” Nino pushed the button above Ohno’s bed which worked as an alarm that could notify Sho and even Jun who lived next door. Aoi who also noticed this, immediately called for help before he checked on Ohno’s condition. After some minutes, Jun barged into their apartment with a trailing Sho. Jun pulled Nino apart to let Sho examined Ohno.
“Ohno-kun, can you hear me?”
“Kaz.. Kazu” Nino immediately rushed to Ohno’s side, holding his hand while Sho was still examining Ohno’s condition.
“Keep talking to him, Nino.”
Nino did as he was told. Ohno finally woke up. He didn’t want to waste this time. He caressed Ohno’s hand while kept talking to him.
Sho hugged Nino after he finished examined Ohno who was now breathing calmly. Sho also had removed some tubes from Ohno’s body. Though some were still there but Ohno was more calming without too much equipment around his body. “Thank you, Nino. Now we can only wait until he wakes up again. I’m sure this time he’s going to fully wake up. His body will feel sore but I’m here to help him.”
“Yes, thank you Sho-chan.”
***
The first time Ohno regained his full consciousness, he finally could response to almost everything Sho asked him even to lift his arm. However, no one dared to inform Ohno about Nino’s blindness. Nino was also still tight lipped at this. He didn’t want to worry Ohno yet. He would know it when the time is right.
“I missed you, old man.”
“Y..our fa..ce i..s a mes.s, Kaz.” Ohno was still struggling to find his words. Sho said it was normal as he was still recovering.
“I was so much a mess, Ohchan.” Nino smiled genuinely sweet which could radiate warmness to Ohno.
“My pre..tty Ka.zun..ari.”
“Sshh.. just be quiet and hurry recover. You owe me lots of things, Satoshi.” As Nino kissed Ohno’s forehead, Ohno back to lull into his relaxing dream.
When they removed all the support equipment from Ohno, it was when Ohno could move some parts of his body and even could notice something was off about Nino.
“Did something happen to you?” Nino didn’t catch the meaning of Ohno’s question. He felt fine and nothing went wrong. But Ohno could see him well.
“I’m fine, Ohchan. Do you need anything?”
“No, Nino. I mean, I know I miss a lot of things but you are just different.”
“I am still the same person who loves you and ready to beat the world only for you to get back to me again.”
“No, really. Are you hiding anything? Look at me, Nino. You can see me, right?”
Nino beamed at him as nothing of Ohno’s question bothered him even a bit, “Of course Ohchan, with all of my heart.”
“Nino, don’t trick me. Tell me something is wrong. I can sense it.”
“What do you think then?” Nino stood up, he hovered above Ohno, and half of his body was now almost covering Ohno. He then caressed Ohno’s cheek. He felt every inch of Ohno face, feeling it alive under his touch. His jaw, his lips, his nose, his eyes, everything felt so live, Nino was grateful. He planted a soft kiss on Ohno’s forehead until Ohno reached for him so that they were staring at each other eye to eye. Nino could sense it, he searched it in his memories how pretty Ohno’s eyes were, they were like his favourite hot chocolate on winter days that could wrap him around like a blanket, engulfed him in its warmth and made him felt so home. Those brown eyes often made him in love again and again. He pretended to see those eyes and how longed he was to see them. Without him realizing it, his tears spilled without notice in front of Ohno.
“You can’t see me, right? Nino, you are losing your sight. Am I right?” Instead of an answer, Nino sobbed by Ohno’s side. He almost lost his composure again. Not like this, not when he supposed to be strong in front of Ohno. After all, he couldn’t lie to Ohno.
Ohno pulled Nino into his embrace, let Nino’s shuddering body crushed him. It must be hard for Nino for these past few months. He could feel all the struggle and restraint Nino had done wore off. Even though Ohno still couldn’t do much, he swore he would be better soon to support Nino, to settle everything up so that every of Nino’s doing wouldn’t be wasted. “It’s fine now. You have me now, Kazu. We’re in this together. I’m sorry for leaving you too long. I won’t go anywhere again. I swear.”
It was nearing Nino’s birthday when Sho barged into their apartment. Ohno now could sit by himself. Even with a little support from Nino, he almost could do everything independently. This was a big improvement for them. Sho was glad that the improvement was fast. “Guys, I have a good news.”
“It would be great if you can sit down first and talk about this good news calmly, Sho-kun.” Jun who was preparing their dinner interrupted Sho’s good vibes. The doctor grinned from head to toe as if he was a kid who just received praise from his parents.
“Jun-kun is right. You’d better sit here and let’s enjoy his pasta. It’s been a while since we gathered like this.” Aiba followed after Jun while serving them the wine he brought this noon.
“And more importantly before the old man beside me eats up all of this delicious pasta.” Nino’s retort earned him a pinch from Ohno, but they were laughing from this old couple’s antic.
Sho agreed to sit beside Aiba and laughed with them. He was glad everything was almost back to normal.
“Umm.. so good!” Both Sho and Ohno exclaimed it together and Jun’s cheek were spotting two red color on each side while he mumbling ‘thank you’.
When they were almost finished, Aiba brought back the unfinished conversation about the thing Sho was about to announce before they dug in. “So what kind of good news you have, Sho-chan?”
Sho downed his wine in one go which almost made him choked. “Right. I got a news that we found Nino a pair of retinas. They are going to come this weekend and I hope Nino would come with me tomorrow to have some medical check-up.”
This good news made everyone in Ohno and Nino’s dining room cheered with the wine they had now. Nino got himself shake a bit. He almost couldn’t believe this was happening. Almost a year earlier, he had lost his hope but now everything would back to normal. If this were a dream he really didn’t want to be woken up. Ohno held his hand tight. The warmth seeped through his skin into his bone, this was real. And the brown eyes he longed to see was going to greet him. He was feeling so grateful. “Thank you guys, thank you.”
Some months later..
“..I vow to be faithful in sickness and in health, during times of want and plenty. I will treasure and care for you as we both shall live.”
“So Ninomiya Kazunari, will you take Ohno Satoshi as your lawfully wedded husband?”
Nino couldn’t stop his tears right now. Ohno looked so bright in front of him. His white suit looked beautifully in contrast with his skin tone. But that was what he loved from his future husband. He finally could see the blooming smile from the man he loved so much. The man who’s going to be with him from now and ever. “I do.”
Then everyone around them cheered in pleasure while the couple sealing their vow with a kiss. They would continue to live their life happily and would treasure every single moment.
~End
Some notes :
*GCS : The Glasgow coma scale is a neurological scale which aims to give a reliable and objective way of recording the conscious state of a person for initial as well as subsequent assessment.
*Washitsu : Japanese term for a room in a house or apartment that has traditional tatami flooring.
*Seiza : Japanese term for one of the traditional formal ways of sitting in Japan.
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I love their dedication to one another. The moment when Ohno found out that Nino was blind made me hurt. Cruel things can really happen to good people sometimes. And I appreciate the support of their friends.
Thank you for your hard work!
And yay, happy ending! :)
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So glad there was a happy ending ♥
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This was amazing. Thank u so much for ur hardwork!
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