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ninoexchange2014-06-17 08:42 pm
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Entry tags:
fic for
yoshiblack16
For:
yoshiblack16
From:
lover_youshould
Title: Sweet Like Hunny
Pairing/Focus: Ohmiya friendship, background Sakumiya romance
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Summary: Stay with me, and maybe I won't cry anymore.
Notes: Dear yoshiblack16: I loved your prompts! There were a few I considered, but in the end, I just kept coming back to this one. I hope you love it. ♥ Thank you to Nino Mod for being excellent as always, and thank you to best beta for being the best beta. ♥♥♥
"Where are you going this time, Papa?"
His father hefts Kazunari up onto his lap and points to a country on the map spread across his desk. "Do you know what this one is called?"
Kazunari leans in and squints at the characters on the map. "Su... pe... Spain?"
"Excellent. And what language do they speak there?"
This Kazunari already knows. "Spanish!"
His father grins at him. "Right again." Then, "Do you know what the Spanish word for bear is?"
Kazunari doesn't know why his father would ask about bears, but he doesn't question it yet, just shakes his head no.
"Oso," his father says. "Can you try? Oso."
Kazunari repeats dutifully, "Oh-so!"
His father pats his shoulder with a quiet laugh. "Very good." He leans back in his chair, hand still on Kazunari's shoulder, and reaches down with his other arm to open the bottom drawer of his desk. "Close your eyes," he says.
Without hesitation, Kazunari closes them. He hears the sounds of a crinkly plastic bag, and then the drawer closes. Then, suddenly, there's something warm and so, so soft in his hands.
"You can look now."
~
"Mama?"
On most days, Kazunari rides the train home from school, warms up some of last night's leftovers, and alternates between homework and video games as he waits for his mother to come home from work, all while chatting with his best friend. But today, when he gets to the train station, he finds his mother on the platform waiting for him.
He's worried at first when he sees the suitcase she's holding on to, big enough to fit clothes for both of them, but then he notices the smile on her face. "Surprise!" she calls, reaching out for him until he's close enough that she can take his hand. Her smile grows, and she gives his fingers a squeeze. "Ready for a weekend at Grandma's?"
Kazunari doesn't much care for surprises, but Grandma Kazue's house is an exception. His grandmother always makes delicious food, and she has guest futons that are way comfier than his bed at home. And what's even more exciting to Kazunari on this particular day is that Oh-chan has never been to his grandmother's house before.
As Kazunari start the long journey to his grandmother's house, Kazunari thinks happily about sharing new food with Oh-chan, showing Oh-chan how soft the futon is, and telling him all about the new boy he met in school today, the one a few grades above him who made him laugh... This weekend, Kazunari is certain, is going to be excellent.
His excitement is still going strong even hours later when they finally get off their last train, where his grandmother is waiting to pick them up from the station. As soon as she makes her way to them in the small crowd of passengers leaving the train, she throws her arms open to envelop him in a fierce hug. "Kacchan! Look how big you are!" She finally lets go and holds him at arm's length to look him up and down. "I swear you've grown three feet since I last saw you. How old are you now? Eight? Nine?"
She's clearly teasing, but he plays along, scowling theatrically. "Eleven, Grandma!"
"Practically an adult!" she crows, ruffling his hair, and then holds up one of skinny wrists, shaking his arm gently. "Look at him, Kazuko, he's thin as a rail. Don't worry, we'll fatten you up before you go back to school. Your classmates won't even recognize you."
After the excitement of their arrival, the car ride to the house is fairly uneventful; his mother sits in the front seat as his grandmother drives, and they talk about how Grandma spends her time, about Kazunari's father off on business again, about how Kazunari is doing in school. Kazunari gets antsier and antsier as the minutes tick by, anxious to get there and find Oh-chan. By this time on a normal day, he and Oh-chan would already have been together for hours, snacking and laughing as Kazunari pretends to study.
When they finally get to the house, Kazunari stands in the driveway bouncing on his heels as his mother and grandmother heft the giant suitcase out of the car trunk. They laugh when he grabs the handle and tries to haul it into the house himself, and when he barks at them, "I'm just doing this so you don't guilt trip me about your aching backs later," they laugh harder.
He drags the suitcase into the familiar guest room, where the windows are open to let in a cool spring breeze, and one of the guest futons is already pulled out and ready for him because his grandmother knows he likes to nap after the long trip. He rolls the suitcase up to the futon and collapses down onto it with a huff, breathless from exertion and excitement all rolled together.
But when he opens the suitcase and looks inside, he doesn't find what he's searching for.
His mother packed his clothes, his toothbrush, his comics, but the one thing he wants is nowhere to be found. He rifles through the entire suitcase, searching frantically, and by the time he's pulled out every last article of clothing, frustrated tears have begun to gather in the corners of his eyes.
He abandons the suitcase and rushes to the kitchen, where his mother and grandmother are preparing tea. He tries to pull himself together, but as soon as they see him, it's clear they know something's wrong.
"Kazu?" His mother sets down the mug she was holding and turns away from the counter to face him. "What's wrong?"
"Mama, where's Oh-chan?"
"Oh-chan...?" She seems confused at first, but as realization dawns, her expression softens. "Sweetie, I'm sorry, I didn't pack him."
Kazunari tries to keep his emotions in check, but he can't help a low-pitched noise of frustration. "Why not?"
"I didn't realize you still played with him."
He wants to yell, wants to tell her that of course he does, but her concerned expression brings him back to his senses. He scrubs his hands over his face and forces his voice deeper, so he sounds less like the whiny kid he's trying not to be anymore. "Never mind. Sorry. I was just expecting him to be there is all."
"Do you need something to sleep with?" his grandmother asks. "I might have some old toys stashed somewhere..."
Kazunari's heart aches at the thought of replacing Oh-chan. "No, I'll be fine." He adds hastily, "I'm a big kid."
"Of course," his mother agrees. When she reaches forward and pulls him to her so she can kiss his forehead, there's no teasing, only affection. "Why don't you go take a nap, and we'll call you when dinner's ready."
"Is hamburger still your favorite?" his grandmother asks.
With a sigh, Kazunari looks down at his toes, struggling to force the words out. "Can we, maybe... have something else tonight? And save the hamburger for last?" That way it will be even fresher when he wraps up a few bites to take home to Oh-chan, he thinks.
"Whatever you want," his grandmother says. "Anything for my Kacchan."
~
"Hey. Hey, kid. Don't cry."
With a startled hiccup, Kazunari looks up from the pillow he was crying into. His bedroom light is off, but there's enough ambient light from the street outside that he can tell there's no one in the room with him. Did he imagine it?
"Seriously," the voice says again. "You're gonna make me cry too."
No, the voice is definitely real. His sadness temporarily forgotten, Kazunari gets up to flip the light switch by the door. Just as he suspected, he's alone in the room.
He wipes the tears from his cheeks and whispers, cautious, "Hello?"
That's when he notices movement from his bed. When he looks more closely, he realizes that his stuffed bear resting against his pillow, the bear his father gave to him right before his last business trip, the one with dark fur and a blond tummy and sleepy eyes... it's looking right at him.
Kazunari blinks a few times. The vision doesn't go away. "Oh... Oh-chan?"
The bear says, "Ah, you stopped."
Kazunari's heart gives a little thud, and he's walking toward the bed before he even realizes he's moving. He reaches out to touch the bear, then thinks better of it and pulls his hand away. "You can talk?" he asks instead.
The bear -- Oh-chan, the same Oh-chan Kazunari's had for months and months -- shrugs his shoulders. Apparently he can move as well. He gives one quiet, wordless noise of confirmation: "Mm."
"But I've had you all this time -- why didn't you say anything before?"
"Dunno," Oh-chan answers simply. When Kazunari keeps staring, Oh-chan offers, "Napping, I guess."
"That was a long nap," Kazunari says, squinting skeptically.
Oh-chan gives another shrug. Then, as if it's part of their conversation, "Why were you crying?"
Kazunari hesitates. He sits down beside Oh-chan and looks down at his hands, and finally says, "My dad... he's only been back a week, and he's already leaving again."
"Is that unusual?" Oh-chan asks. He sounds curious, as if he really doesn't know whether absent dads are common or not. Well, Kazunari reasons, he's just a stuffed bear -- why would he know?
"Not unusual for us," Kazunari admits. "He's gone most of the time. But every time he leaves, my mom starts crying. I hate when she cries."
For a few breathless moments, Oh-chan is completely silent, and Kazunari wonders if he's gone back to sleep. Then Oh-chan's little paw reaches out and rests, gentle, on Kazunari's knee. "I hate when you cry," he says, mimicking Kazunari's tone perfectly. Kazunari can't help but laugh, equal parts amused and touched.
"Stay up with me, then," he says, and strokes the soft fur of Oh-chan's ears, the way he's done a million times before. "And maybe I won't cry anymore."
~
"I'm home~"
By the time Kazunari gets through his bedroom door, he's already unwrapping the treat he's been cradling in his jacket pocket all day. "Hey, Oh-chan," he calls, kicking the door closed behind him.
Oh-chan is exactly where Kazunari left him that morning: on the bed, napping against the pillows, striped with gold by the afternoon sunlight filtering in through the blinds. His sleepy eyes flutter open at the sound of Kazunari's voice, and his mouth turns up in a gentle smile. "Welcome back."
Kazunari flops down onto the bed, jostling Oh-chan around. "I brought you something," he says, showing off the package of wax paper soaked through in spots with oil. He pulls back one corner of the paper, revealing half a pastry underneath. It's a little smooshed from being carried around all day, but it still looks absolutely delectable; the dough looks flaky and light, and the whole thing is glazed with...
Oh-chan sniffs at it, his eyes widening the slightest bit. "Is that honey?"
Kazunari doesn't answer in words, just tears off a piece and offers it. Oh-chan takes the bite right from his fingers and munches on it happily, making excited noises before finally mumbling around a mouthful, "Delicious!"
Kazunari nibbles on his own piece. "Remember Sho-kun?"
"The one you like," Oh-chan says offhandedly, waving his fuzzy arms in the direction of the pastry in a clear demand for more. He either doesn't notice or doesn't comment on the blush that colors Kazunari's cheeks.
"He mentioned these super tasty pastries the other day," Kazunari says, tactfully not responding to Oh-chan's description. "And I'm not crazy about sweets, right, but I know you love them, so I told Sho-kun he should bring me one. Today he brought me two."
Around another mouthful, Oh-chan mumbles, "Maybe he likes you too."
Kazunari shoves the rest into Oh-chan's mouth to shut him up. "I ate half of one with Sho-kun because -- well because it would be rude not to, right, and then I promised Aiba-chan I'd give him some on the way home, and then Aiba-chan told Matsujun and of course he wanted some too... Anyway, this is all that was left."
"You should ask him for a dozen more," Oh-chan says, spraying crumbs everywhere.
Kazunari flicks his ear in retaliation. "Don't be ridiculous," he grumbles. "Besides, he probably just brought me these out of politeness."
"But two? That's really polite."
Kazunari shrugs, looking down at the wax paper, dotted all over with crumbs and honey. "I dunno. His family is super rich or something. Maybe that's just what they do." His thoughtful frown deepens into a scowl. "Maybe he feels bad for me because my family is poor."
For a while Oh-chan says nothing, chewing silently, but finally he asks, "Did he actually say that?"
"He wouldn't just come out and say it like that, Oh-chan."
"Maybe you should have a little more faith in people."
Kazunari rolls his eyes. "What do you know about people, anyway? I've been watching people for fifteen years. You've only ever known me."
"And I like you," Oh-chan says, nodding stubbornly. "And if I could, I'd bring you two pastries even though you only asked for one."
Kazunari tries to glare, but it's too ridiculous. He smiles, and laughs, and pokes Oh-chan's fluffy stomach just hard enough to make him yelp. "Don't worry," he says. "If I ask for two next time and he brings me four, I'll make sure you get one all to yourself."
~
"Where'd you come from, Oh-chan?"
Kazunari is supposed to be asleep -- it's the middle of the night, and he has school tomorrow -- but instead he's awake, curled up under a bedsheet with Oh-chan and a flashlight. Oh-chan shrugs his little shoulders and says, "Dunno."
"Do you remember anything from before me?"
"Not really."
"What do you do when I'm not around?"
"Nap, I guess."
"Do you dream?"
"Don't think so."
Kazunari narrows his eye, studying Oh-chan's face, but Oh-chan just stares back. "What do you think about?"
Oh-chan says again, "Dunno," but it comes out with a tiny huff of laughter, as if he knows how silly he's being.
Kazunari fires back with a poke to Oh-chan's belly. "What about this? Can you feel?"
Oh-chan jerks like it tickles, but all he says is, "Mm."
Kazunari ponders for a moment, and then asks, "Do you feel... hungry?"
This time, Oh-chan responds with his whole body, back straightening and eyes going big and round. "Yes!"
Kazunari grins, triumphant. "Wait here."
He pokes his head out into the hallway, listening for a few beats to make sure his mother is asleep. When he's sure that she is, he motions for Oh-chan to follow him, and together they tiptoe into the kitchen.
There's not much there, Kazunari knows before he even starts to look. His father's been gone a while, and his mother hasn't been getting as many hours at her job as they're used to. He peeks into the fridge and doesn't see much that he knows what to do with, other than the meager leftovers from dinner, but he knows those are designated as tomorrow's lunch. He gives up on the fridge, and luckily, a chair quietly dragged to the cupboards above the sink helps him find a sticky and half-empty jar of honey and a sealed plastic pouch with the last crumbly pieces of rice crackers.
"They're a little stale," he apologizes when he offers them to Oh-chan, but Oh-chan doesn't seem to mind.
Kazunari isn't really surprised, not after days of talking to an animated stuffed bear, but it's still wondrous to see Oh-chan reach out and take the rice crackers in his paw, even more wondrous to see his mouth open to accept them. When he closes his mouth again, Kazunari can even hear him chew.
"How do you like them?" he asks.
Oh-chan swallows noisily and whispers, "Delicious!". He eyes the sticky jar in Kazunari's other hand. "What's that?"
Kazunari turns to find a spoon. "I think you're really gonna like this stuff."
He's right: Oh-chan likes the honey so much that he'd finish the whole thing off if Kazunari weren't there to stop him. As he's screwing the lid back on, he vows to start saving and scavenging, already imagining all the lunches and dinners and in-between snacks he can help his new best friend discover. "From now on, Oh-chan," he says, "we'll share everything. Just wait and see."
~
"Pick a card, any card."
Oh-chan stares at the deck of cards spread out before him, deliberating for long enough that Kazunari is about to grouse at him to hurry up. He finally reaches and slides one of the cards out from a spot just a little left of center.
"Now look at it, but don't let me see it," Kazunari instructs, "and memorize it." He gathers up the rest of the cards and begins to shuffle them, his hands moving quickly, expertly. When they're all shuffled together, he presents the deck once again. "Now put it back in, wherever you want."
Oh-chan does, and Kazunari goes back to shuffling. He picks up a previous conversation as he goes; his mother has always told him that distraction is essential to a successful trick. "So, Sho-kun's grad party is tomorrow."
"Fun," Oh-chan says, looking right at Kazunari's face like he's already forgotten all about the cards.
"Aiba-chan talked me into showing Sho-kun some of my tricks, and then Sho-kun was like, 'Oh, you should do them at the party, everyone will think it's super cool'..."
He trails off, a little embarrassed now that he's said the words aloud. Oh-chan smiles knowingly but says nothing.
When the cards are shuffled properly, Kazunari presents the deck once again. "Cut it, please." Oh-chan carefully separates the deck into two halves, and when he's done, Kazunari shuffles them back together once and then spreads them out in a pretty arch. "Now pick a new card."
Oh-chan's eyes light up when he sees that this new card is identical to the first one. "Uwaa! How cool!"
Kazunari grins at the praise. No matter how many times Oh-chan reacts that way, it still affects him -- just like Oh-chan is still so awed no matter how many times Kazunari has shown him this trick.
"Anyway," he says, scooping up the cards to shuffle them once again. "Today Sho-kun told me that he's not sure, he hasn't managed to convince his dad yet, but there's a possibility that, uh --" His voice catches, and he clears his throat quickly, hands fumbling. "-- that, uh, I might be able to spend the night." He doesn't dare look up to see the expression on Oh-chan's face. "Do you think you'll be okay on your own?"
"Of course," Oh-chan says easily, perfectly normal, and then he sing-songs in a high-pitched voice, "I told you he likes you~"
"Shut up," Kazunari snaps, pushing Oh-chan hard enough to knock him over, and ignores the quiet chuffs of laughter as Oh-chan rights himself. He can feel himself blushing furiously, but he barrels on, spreading the cards out anew. "Now help me practice this new one. Pick a card, any card."
~
"Wanna see something cool?"
Oh-chan sits up, his eyes already open as if he'd been waiting for Kazunari to open the door. "What is it?"
Kazunari settles down onto the bed and shows Oh-chan the card trick his mother just taught him, moving slowly and carefully through each step. It's difficult for his small hands to manipulate the cards, but he only messes up once, and Oh-chan pretends not to notice. At the end, when Oh-chan picks a card and sees that it's the same as the first one, he reacts with loud, genuine enthusiasm.
"So cool," he gushes, smiling wide.
Kazunari smiles bashfully. "Thanks, Oh-chan."
They go through it a few more times so that Kazunari can practice handling the cards, and Oh-chan reacts the same way each time, until Kazunari is laughing too hard to shuffle anymore. He puts the cards away, and they settle down on the bed, both of them tired from all the excitement.
After a few minutes of sleepy silence, Kazunari says, "Hey, Oh-chan."
Oh-chan is lying motionless at his side, probably already halfway into a nap. "Hm?"
"Do you think you're magic?"
Oh-chan seems to think about it, quiet for a while. Finally he says, "Might be."
It's pretty much what Kazunari was expecting. "Or maybe you used to be human," he offers, "and then you were reincarnated."
"Maybe."
"Or maybe an evil sorcerer stuck your soul in a stuffed bear as punishment for stealing an ancient artifact -- like a... a spellbook or something."
"Possible."
"Or maybe you're a ghost who has unfinished business here in the physical world."
Oh-chan makes a noise of uncertainty. "That one's a little silly."
Kazunari laughs, nudging Oh-chan with his elbow. "Why that one!"
Oh-chan laughs too, helplessly amused by Kazunari's reaction. When they've settled down once again, he asks, "Do you believe in those things?". He doesn't sound accusing, just curious.
"Not really," Kazunari admits. "But then again, I didn't believe in talking bears, either."
"Mm." He can feel Oh-chan stretch out beside him, settling in for a nap. "Yeah," Oh-chan agrees, voice growing sleepier by the second. "I guess anything is possible."
~
"You've been spending a lot of time with Sho-kun lately."
There's no judgement in Oh-chan's voice, not even a little, but Kazunari can't help the guilt he feels at those words. "He's been helping me study," he mumbles, tapping his pencil against the cover of his econ textbook. "Since he already graduated, he knows what I should pay attention to for finals."
Oh-chan doesn't move. "Mm."
When Oh-chan doesn't say anything else, Kazunari allows himself to look away, biting his lip as he ponders. There's so much he wants to say, but Sho's coming to pick him up, and he doesn't know how much time he and Oh-chan have together.
"Oh-chan," he finally says. "I wanted to tell you... I got that scholarship I applied for."
"That's great," Oh-chan says. He doesn't sound particularly enthusiastic, his voice as calm as ever, but that's just how he is when it comes to things that aren't food or magic tricks. Kazunari knows he means it.
"And I've been wondering," Kazunari continues, "when I go off to college, if I... if I should bring you along or not."
"Mm."
When Kazunari glances back at Oh-chan, his eyes are closed, and his chest is rising and falling at a calm, even pace, like he's already slipping into a nap. Kazunari says quietly, "I just feel like other people might think it's kind of weird."
Slowly, Oh-chan's eyes drift open as he turns to look at Kazunari. "Do they think it's weird, or do you?"
Kazunari feels stung by those words. Ever since that first night, he's always wanted to tell people, he's wanted to tell everyone, about Oh-chan. But he knew, instinctively, that talking to his stuffed animal and having it talk back probably wasn't normal; he didn't want to deal with people telling him he was crazy, he definitely didn't want his mother to have to deal with something like that on top of everything else she had to deal with, and most of all, he didn't want anyone to try and take Oh-chan away from him. So he kept Oh-chan to himself -- their little secret -- and neither of them ever minded before.
But the older he gets, the higher the stakes become. What would people say now if they knew about Oh-chan?
And the older he gets, the more he starts to suspect that whatever they'd say might actually be true.
"I don't know," he says. Despite the fibs he tells every day, he's never been able to lie to Oh-chan.
Oh-chan purses his mouth at that. "I guess it is a little weird," he says, shrugging. "Weird never bothered me. But I'd understand."
There's no doubt in Kazunari's mind that Oh-chan, just like before, just like always, means every word he says. He doesn't know how to respond. He doesn't know what could possibly be said.
At his side, his phone buzzes. It's a message from Sho. Here.
"Oh-chan." As he stands up, Kazunari tries to apologize with his expression, with his tone, unable to do it in words. "I have to go."
Oh-chan's mouth turns up in a gentle smile, mirroring his sleepy eyes. He watches Kazunari gather his things, and he keeps smiling. "I understand."
~
"Pretty, aren't they?"
There aren't many stars visible from Kazunari's bedroom window, not this deep in the city, but the ones they can see are bright and sparkly enough to make the sight worthwhile. Oh-chan peers up through the window, following Kazunari's gaze, and agrees wordlessly.
"Have you seen them before?" Kazunari asks, glancing down at Oh-chan. "Before you were with me, I mean."
Oh-chan thinks about it, and finally says, "I guess so."
Kazunari rests his elbow on the windowsill, chin perched on his hand. "What else have you seen?"
"Mountains," Oh-chan answers after some thought. "Forests. Deserts. Snow. I think I like the ocean."
Kazunari groans, wrinkling his nose. "I hate the ocean!"
Oh-chan doesn't agree or disagree, just asks, "What's it like?"
Kazunari splutters. "How can you not know? You just said you like it!"
Oh-chan simply shrugs.
Kazunari scowls, but answers anyway, unable to resist Oh-chan's constant and endearing curiosity. "If you go to the beach, there's sand everywhere and it gets in everything. There'd be sand in your stuffing if you went. And if you're in the water, it's all wavy and bouncy."
"And you don't like that?"
"I went on a boat once with my grandma and I threw up."
Oh-chan makes a noise of sympathy. When he finally speaks again, all he says is, "But I like it."
"Seriously," Kazunari groans, "have you been there or not?"
Oh-chan shrugs. "Dunno."
"Ugh, you're so weird." Kazunari sighs and looks back up at the stars, twinkling as if they're laughing fondly at him. "If it were with you," he says quietly, "I'd try the ocean again."
"Even if you might throw up again?"
Kazunari bristles at the memory, but smiles at the thought of being there with Oh-chan. "Maybe if I'm with you, I won't get sick." He imagines them there, on the beach, rolling in the sand, floating on the waves. He doesn't particularly like any of those things -- he can barely even stand PE -- but it's fun to think about doing them with Oh-chan at his side. He thinks of all the other places Oh-chan has already-maybe visited, thinks about the two of them baking in the desert, shivering in the snow, climbing the oldest trees, scaling the tallest mountains...
"It's settled," he decides, throwing an arm around Oh-chan's tiny shoulders. "We'll definitely go there together some day."
Oh-chan makes a quiet sound of contentment and smiles, leaning into Kazunari's side. "I think I'd like that."
~
"Wake up, Oh-chan."
Oh-chan's eyes slowly blink open. "Ah," he murmurs, rubbing at his eyes with balled-up paws. "Welcome back."
"Shh." Kazunari reaches down to pick Oh-chan up from where he'd been napping, in his usual spot on the pillow. He rubs his thumbs up and down Oh-chan's soft belly, and wonders if Oh-chan has always been this small. "Sho-kun's here," he whispers. "We found a nice place by his new job. We're packing up today."
Oh-chan smiles, slow and sincere. "I'm really happy for you."
Kazunari's heart clenches in his chest. "Thank you, Oh-chan."
With a stifled yawn, Oh-chan stretches his arms up over his head. The stitches holding him together are starting to fray a little. "I'm pretty sleepy," he says, arms coming back down to rest against Kazunari's wrists.
"Gonna take another nap while I'm gone?"
Oh-chan shrugs. His little paws stroke Kazunari's skin, and then they go still. "Maybe longer than a nap this time." His eyes are already starting to drift closed again.
Kazunari swallows thickly, feeling his heartbeat all the way in his throat. He pulls Oh-chan to his chest, hugging him fiercely. "Sweet dreams, Oh-chan."
He hears a single, quiet syllable, mumbled into the folds of his shirt: "Mm."
Behind Kazunari, faint laughter from the kitchen grows louder, and then Sho is standing there in the doorway, holding a stack of flat boxes in one arm and a plate of cookies in the other. "Nino, your mom is insisting we take this -- hey, what's that?"
Kazunari turns, still clutching Oh-chan tight. He realizes that's what he's doing and forces himself to pull Oh-chan away, holding him at arm's length. "Oh, this -- this is Oh-chan. I've had him since I was little."
"Cute!"
Sho drops the boxes in the doorway, and sets the cookies on the dresser, and steps over to Kazunari's side to look down at Oh-chan -- at Oh-chan's dark fur and blond tummy, his sleepy eyes...
"He's adorable," Sho says, smiling like he really means it and not like he's just being polite; it's been long enough now that Kazunari can tell the difference. When he doesn't respond, Sho looks up at him, watches him for a moment before nudging him gently. "You okay?"
"I'm fine." Kazunari doesn't quite believe the words even as he says them. "I guess I just didn't realize how much I missed him."
Sho takes Oh-chan from Kazunari's hold -- Kazunari lets him -- and says, "Let's bring him along." Kazunari fixes him with a skeptical stare, but Sho doesn't back down. "Seriously! I've got a whole box of sentimental stuff from when I was a kid, just in case I ever want to look at it again. It's just one box, you know? It's not like it's taking up a bunch of space. No harm done."
Kazunari looks back down at Oh-chan, resting in Sho's gentle hands. "Yeah," he says. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He reaches up to stroke the soft fur of Oh-chan's ears, and that familiar gesture, mixed with fond memories, the home he's leaving but can always come back to, the woman who raised him and is waiting to send him off with laughter and a plate of cookies instead of tears, the man he loves standing beside him... All of it together makes him smile, big and genuine, makes him feel light. He turns to lay a quick kiss on Sho's mouth, and he pulls Oh-chan back to his chest. "Okay," he says, more sure of himself this time. "Let's bring him along."
Sho is grinning, with his mouth and with his eyes. "Besides," he adds, "even if you don't look at him all the time, it'll be nice to know he's there for you if you need him."
~
"Hey, look. You're not crying."
Kazunari hadn't really been thinking of it as they lie there, curled around each other under the blankets. He can still hear his mother crying in the room beside his, but it's true what Oh-chan said: when he touches his cheeks, he finds them dry. "Yeah," he says. "I guess not."
In the darkness, he feels Oh-chan's paw touch his hand. "I'm sorry your mom gets so sad."
Kazunari nods, using Oh-chan's go-to response. "Mm."
"And I'm sorry your dad is away so often."
Kazunari shrugs. "Mm."
"But I'm glad you're not crying. I hate when you cry."
At that, Kazunari laughs. "Oh-chan, you've only seen me cry that one time."
"Yeah," Oh-chan agrees. "But I really hated it."
"Well I told you I wouldn't anymore as long as you stayed with me. And you did."
Oh-chan says nothing in response, but Kazunari knows he heard.
"I think that's why it's okay," Kazunari says after a moment of pondering. "I hate that my mom is sad, but I know she'll be all right, because even if my dad doesn't stick around, I will. I'll always stay with her. I won't ever make her cry." Oh-chan snuggles closer, silent. Without thinking, Kazunari reaches up to stroke his ears. "And you'll never make me cry, either."
Kazunari's a smart kid, that much he knows is true. The adults in his life are always telling him so, and he's good at magic, and he's good at predicting what people are going to do or say. Despite all of that, he can't tell what the future will bring -- how could he? He knows, after all, that magic isn't real, no matter how badly he wants to believe.
But he does know that what he's saying right now is true. Wholly, irrefutably true. Nothing in his life has ever been more real.
"You'll always be there when I need you, right, Oh-chan?"
Oh-chan reaches out to pat one fuzzy paw against Kazunari's stomach. In the quiet dark of their room, he sighs softly into the folds of Kazunari's shirt, and then he speaks, his voice sleepy-soft.
"Always."
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From:
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Title: Sweet Like Hunny
Pairing/Focus: Ohmiya friendship, background Sakumiya romance
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Summary: Stay with me, and maybe I won't cry anymore.
Notes: Dear yoshiblack16: I loved your prompts! There were a few I considered, but in the end, I just kept coming back to this one. I hope you love it. ♥ Thank you to Nino Mod for being excellent as always, and thank you to best beta for being the best beta. ♥♥♥
"Where are you going this time, Papa?"
His father hefts Kazunari up onto his lap and points to a country on the map spread across his desk. "Do you know what this one is called?"
Kazunari leans in and squints at the characters on the map. "Su... pe... Spain?"
"Excellent. And what language do they speak there?"
This Kazunari already knows. "Spanish!"
His father grins at him. "Right again." Then, "Do you know what the Spanish word for bear is?"
Kazunari doesn't know why his father would ask about bears, but he doesn't question it yet, just shakes his head no.
"Oso," his father says. "Can you try? Oso."
Kazunari repeats dutifully, "Oh-so!"
His father pats his shoulder with a quiet laugh. "Very good." He leans back in his chair, hand still on Kazunari's shoulder, and reaches down with his other arm to open the bottom drawer of his desk. "Close your eyes," he says.
Without hesitation, Kazunari closes them. He hears the sounds of a crinkly plastic bag, and then the drawer closes. Then, suddenly, there's something warm and so, so soft in his hands.
"You can look now."
~
"Mama?"
On most days, Kazunari rides the train home from school, warms up some of last night's leftovers, and alternates between homework and video games as he waits for his mother to come home from work, all while chatting with his best friend. But today, when he gets to the train station, he finds his mother on the platform waiting for him.
He's worried at first when he sees the suitcase she's holding on to, big enough to fit clothes for both of them, but then he notices the smile on her face. "Surprise!" she calls, reaching out for him until he's close enough that she can take his hand. Her smile grows, and she gives his fingers a squeeze. "Ready for a weekend at Grandma's?"
Kazunari doesn't much care for surprises, but Grandma Kazue's house is an exception. His grandmother always makes delicious food, and she has guest futons that are way comfier than his bed at home. And what's even more exciting to Kazunari on this particular day is that Oh-chan has never been to his grandmother's house before.
As Kazunari start the long journey to his grandmother's house, Kazunari thinks happily about sharing new food with Oh-chan, showing Oh-chan how soft the futon is, and telling him all about the new boy he met in school today, the one a few grades above him who made him laugh... This weekend, Kazunari is certain, is going to be excellent.
His excitement is still going strong even hours later when they finally get off their last train, where his grandmother is waiting to pick them up from the station. As soon as she makes her way to them in the small crowd of passengers leaving the train, she throws her arms open to envelop him in a fierce hug. "Kacchan! Look how big you are!" She finally lets go and holds him at arm's length to look him up and down. "I swear you've grown three feet since I last saw you. How old are you now? Eight? Nine?"
She's clearly teasing, but he plays along, scowling theatrically. "Eleven, Grandma!"
"Practically an adult!" she crows, ruffling his hair, and then holds up one of skinny wrists, shaking his arm gently. "Look at him, Kazuko, he's thin as a rail. Don't worry, we'll fatten you up before you go back to school. Your classmates won't even recognize you."
After the excitement of their arrival, the car ride to the house is fairly uneventful; his mother sits in the front seat as his grandmother drives, and they talk about how Grandma spends her time, about Kazunari's father off on business again, about how Kazunari is doing in school. Kazunari gets antsier and antsier as the minutes tick by, anxious to get there and find Oh-chan. By this time on a normal day, he and Oh-chan would already have been together for hours, snacking and laughing as Kazunari pretends to study.
When they finally get to the house, Kazunari stands in the driveway bouncing on his heels as his mother and grandmother heft the giant suitcase out of the car trunk. They laugh when he grabs the handle and tries to haul it into the house himself, and when he barks at them, "I'm just doing this so you don't guilt trip me about your aching backs later," they laugh harder.
He drags the suitcase into the familiar guest room, where the windows are open to let in a cool spring breeze, and one of the guest futons is already pulled out and ready for him because his grandmother knows he likes to nap after the long trip. He rolls the suitcase up to the futon and collapses down onto it with a huff, breathless from exertion and excitement all rolled together.
But when he opens the suitcase and looks inside, he doesn't find what he's searching for.
His mother packed his clothes, his toothbrush, his comics, but the one thing he wants is nowhere to be found. He rifles through the entire suitcase, searching frantically, and by the time he's pulled out every last article of clothing, frustrated tears have begun to gather in the corners of his eyes.
He abandons the suitcase and rushes to the kitchen, where his mother and grandmother are preparing tea. He tries to pull himself together, but as soon as they see him, it's clear they know something's wrong.
"Kazu?" His mother sets down the mug she was holding and turns away from the counter to face him. "What's wrong?"
"Mama, where's Oh-chan?"
"Oh-chan...?" She seems confused at first, but as realization dawns, her expression softens. "Sweetie, I'm sorry, I didn't pack him."
Kazunari tries to keep his emotions in check, but he can't help a low-pitched noise of frustration. "Why not?"
"I didn't realize you still played with him."
He wants to yell, wants to tell her that of course he does, but her concerned expression brings him back to his senses. He scrubs his hands over his face and forces his voice deeper, so he sounds less like the whiny kid he's trying not to be anymore. "Never mind. Sorry. I was just expecting him to be there is all."
"Do you need something to sleep with?" his grandmother asks. "I might have some old toys stashed somewhere..."
Kazunari's heart aches at the thought of replacing Oh-chan. "No, I'll be fine." He adds hastily, "I'm a big kid."
"Of course," his mother agrees. When she reaches forward and pulls him to her so she can kiss his forehead, there's no teasing, only affection. "Why don't you go take a nap, and we'll call you when dinner's ready."
"Is hamburger still your favorite?" his grandmother asks.
With a sigh, Kazunari looks down at his toes, struggling to force the words out. "Can we, maybe... have something else tonight? And save the hamburger for last?" That way it will be even fresher when he wraps up a few bites to take home to Oh-chan, he thinks.
"Whatever you want," his grandmother says. "Anything for my Kacchan."
~
"Hey. Hey, kid. Don't cry."
With a startled hiccup, Kazunari looks up from the pillow he was crying into. His bedroom light is off, but there's enough ambient light from the street outside that he can tell there's no one in the room with him. Did he imagine it?
"Seriously," the voice says again. "You're gonna make me cry too."
No, the voice is definitely real. His sadness temporarily forgotten, Kazunari gets up to flip the light switch by the door. Just as he suspected, he's alone in the room.
He wipes the tears from his cheeks and whispers, cautious, "Hello?"
That's when he notices movement from his bed. When he looks more closely, he realizes that his stuffed bear resting against his pillow, the bear his father gave to him right before his last business trip, the one with dark fur and a blond tummy and sleepy eyes... it's looking right at him.
Kazunari blinks a few times. The vision doesn't go away. "Oh... Oh-chan?"
The bear says, "Ah, you stopped."
Kazunari's heart gives a little thud, and he's walking toward the bed before he even realizes he's moving. He reaches out to touch the bear, then thinks better of it and pulls his hand away. "You can talk?" he asks instead.
The bear -- Oh-chan, the same Oh-chan Kazunari's had for months and months -- shrugs his shoulders. Apparently he can move as well. He gives one quiet, wordless noise of confirmation: "Mm."
"But I've had you all this time -- why didn't you say anything before?"
"Dunno," Oh-chan answers simply. When Kazunari keeps staring, Oh-chan offers, "Napping, I guess."
"That was a long nap," Kazunari says, squinting skeptically.
Oh-chan gives another shrug. Then, as if it's part of their conversation, "Why were you crying?"
Kazunari hesitates. He sits down beside Oh-chan and looks down at his hands, and finally says, "My dad... he's only been back a week, and he's already leaving again."
"Is that unusual?" Oh-chan asks. He sounds curious, as if he really doesn't know whether absent dads are common or not. Well, Kazunari reasons, he's just a stuffed bear -- why would he know?
"Not unusual for us," Kazunari admits. "He's gone most of the time. But every time he leaves, my mom starts crying. I hate when she cries."
For a few breathless moments, Oh-chan is completely silent, and Kazunari wonders if he's gone back to sleep. Then Oh-chan's little paw reaches out and rests, gentle, on Kazunari's knee. "I hate when you cry," he says, mimicking Kazunari's tone perfectly. Kazunari can't help but laugh, equal parts amused and touched.
"Stay up with me, then," he says, and strokes the soft fur of Oh-chan's ears, the way he's done a million times before. "And maybe I won't cry anymore."
~
"I'm home~"
By the time Kazunari gets through his bedroom door, he's already unwrapping the treat he's been cradling in his jacket pocket all day. "Hey, Oh-chan," he calls, kicking the door closed behind him.
Oh-chan is exactly where Kazunari left him that morning: on the bed, napping against the pillows, striped with gold by the afternoon sunlight filtering in through the blinds. His sleepy eyes flutter open at the sound of Kazunari's voice, and his mouth turns up in a gentle smile. "Welcome back."
Kazunari flops down onto the bed, jostling Oh-chan around. "I brought you something," he says, showing off the package of wax paper soaked through in spots with oil. He pulls back one corner of the paper, revealing half a pastry underneath. It's a little smooshed from being carried around all day, but it still looks absolutely delectable; the dough looks flaky and light, and the whole thing is glazed with...
Oh-chan sniffs at it, his eyes widening the slightest bit. "Is that honey?"
Kazunari doesn't answer in words, just tears off a piece and offers it. Oh-chan takes the bite right from his fingers and munches on it happily, making excited noises before finally mumbling around a mouthful, "Delicious!"
Kazunari nibbles on his own piece. "Remember Sho-kun?"
"The one you like," Oh-chan says offhandedly, waving his fuzzy arms in the direction of the pastry in a clear demand for more. He either doesn't notice or doesn't comment on the blush that colors Kazunari's cheeks.
"He mentioned these super tasty pastries the other day," Kazunari says, tactfully not responding to Oh-chan's description. "And I'm not crazy about sweets, right, but I know you love them, so I told Sho-kun he should bring me one. Today he brought me two."
Around another mouthful, Oh-chan mumbles, "Maybe he likes you too."
Kazunari shoves the rest into Oh-chan's mouth to shut him up. "I ate half of one with Sho-kun because -- well because it would be rude not to, right, and then I promised Aiba-chan I'd give him some on the way home, and then Aiba-chan told Matsujun and of course he wanted some too... Anyway, this is all that was left."
"You should ask him for a dozen more," Oh-chan says, spraying crumbs everywhere.
Kazunari flicks his ear in retaliation. "Don't be ridiculous," he grumbles. "Besides, he probably just brought me these out of politeness."
"But two? That's really polite."
Kazunari shrugs, looking down at the wax paper, dotted all over with crumbs and honey. "I dunno. His family is super rich or something. Maybe that's just what they do." His thoughtful frown deepens into a scowl. "Maybe he feels bad for me because my family is poor."
For a while Oh-chan says nothing, chewing silently, but finally he asks, "Did he actually say that?"
"He wouldn't just come out and say it like that, Oh-chan."
"Maybe you should have a little more faith in people."
Kazunari rolls his eyes. "What do you know about people, anyway? I've been watching people for fifteen years. You've only ever known me."
"And I like you," Oh-chan says, nodding stubbornly. "And if I could, I'd bring you two pastries even though you only asked for one."
Kazunari tries to glare, but it's too ridiculous. He smiles, and laughs, and pokes Oh-chan's fluffy stomach just hard enough to make him yelp. "Don't worry," he says. "If I ask for two next time and he brings me four, I'll make sure you get one all to yourself."
~
"Where'd you come from, Oh-chan?"
Kazunari is supposed to be asleep -- it's the middle of the night, and he has school tomorrow -- but instead he's awake, curled up under a bedsheet with Oh-chan and a flashlight. Oh-chan shrugs his little shoulders and says, "Dunno."
"Do you remember anything from before me?"
"Not really."
"What do you do when I'm not around?"
"Nap, I guess."
"Do you dream?"
"Don't think so."
Kazunari narrows his eye, studying Oh-chan's face, but Oh-chan just stares back. "What do you think about?"
Oh-chan says again, "Dunno," but it comes out with a tiny huff of laughter, as if he knows how silly he's being.
Kazunari fires back with a poke to Oh-chan's belly. "What about this? Can you feel?"
Oh-chan jerks like it tickles, but all he says is, "Mm."
Kazunari ponders for a moment, and then asks, "Do you feel... hungry?"
This time, Oh-chan responds with his whole body, back straightening and eyes going big and round. "Yes!"
Kazunari grins, triumphant. "Wait here."
He pokes his head out into the hallway, listening for a few beats to make sure his mother is asleep. When he's sure that she is, he motions for Oh-chan to follow him, and together they tiptoe into the kitchen.
There's not much there, Kazunari knows before he even starts to look. His father's been gone a while, and his mother hasn't been getting as many hours at her job as they're used to. He peeks into the fridge and doesn't see much that he knows what to do with, other than the meager leftovers from dinner, but he knows those are designated as tomorrow's lunch. He gives up on the fridge, and luckily, a chair quietly dragged to the cupboards above the sink helps him find a sticky and half-empty jar of honey and a sealed plastic pouch with the last crumbly pieces of rice crackers.
"They're a little stale," he apologizes when he offers them to Oh-chan, but Oh-chan doesn't seem to mind.
Kazunari isn't really surprised, not after days of talking to an animated stuffed bear, but it's still wondrous to see Oh-chan reach out and take the rice crackers in his paw, even more wondrous to see his mouth open to accept them. When he closes his mouth again, Kazunari can even hear him chew.
"How do you like them?" he asks.
Oh-chan swallows noisily and whispers, "Delicious!". He eyes the sticky jar in Kazunari's other hand. "What's that?"
Kazunari turns to find a spoon. "I think you're really gonna like this stuff."
He's right: Oh-chan likes the honey so much that he'd finish the whole thing off if Kazunari weren't there to stop him. As he's screwing the lid back on, he vows to start saving and scavenging, already imagining all the lunches and dinners and in-between snacks he can help his new best friend discover. "From now on, Oh-chan," he says, "we'll share everything. Just wait and see."
~
"Pick a card, any card."
Oh-chan stares at the deck of cards spread out before him, deliberating for long enough that Kazunari is about to grouse at him to hurry up. He finally reaches and slides one of the cards out from a spot just a little left of center.
"Now look at it, but don't let me see it," Kazunari instructs, "and memorize it." He gathers up the rest of the cards and begins to shuffle them, his hands moving quickly, expertly. When they're all shuffled together, he presents the deck once again. "Now put it back in, wherever you want."
Oh-chan does, and Kazunari goes back to shuffling. He picks up a previous conversation as he goes; his mother has always told him that distraction is essential to a successful trick. "So, Sho-kun's grad party is tomorrow."
"Fun," Oh-chan says, looking right at Kazunari's face like he's already forgotten all about the cards.
"Aiba-chan talked me into showing Sho-kun some of my tricks, and then Sho-kun was like, 'Oh, you should do them at the party, everyone will think it's super cool'..."
He trails off, a little embarrassed now that he's said the words aloud. Oh-chan smiles knowingly but says nothing.
When the cards are shuffled properly, Kazunari presents the deck once again. "Cut it, please." Oh-chan carefully separates the deck into two halves, and when he's done, Kazunari shuffles them back together once and then spreads them out in a pretty arch. "Now pick a new card."
Oh-chan's eyes light up when he sees that this new card is identical to the first one. "Uwaa! How cool!"
Kazunari grins at the praise. No matter how many times Oh-chan reacts that way, it still affects him -- just like Oh-chan is still so awed no matter how many times Kazunari has shown him this trick.
"Anyway," he says, scooping up the cards to shuffle them once again. "Today Sho-kun told me that he's not sure, he hasn't managed to convince his dad yet, but there's a possibility that, uh --" His voice catches, and he clears his throat quickly, hands fumbling. "-- that, uh, I might be able to spend the night." He doesn't dare look up to see the expression on Oh-chan's face. "Do you think you'll be okay on your own?"
"Of course," Oh-chan says easily, perfectly normal, and then he sing-songs in a high-pitched voice, "I told you he likes you~"
"Shut up," Kazunari snaps, pushing Oh-chan hard enough to knock him over, and ignores the quiet chuffs of laughter as Oh-chan rights himself. He can feel himself blushing furiously, but he barrels on, spreading the cards out anew. "Now help me practice this new one. Pick a card, any card."
~
"Wanna see something cool?"
Oh-chan sits up, his eyes already open as if he'd been waiting for Kazunari to open the door. "What is it?"
Kazunari settles down onto the bed and shows Oh-chan the card trick his mother just taught him, moving slowly and carefully through each step. It's difficult for his small hands to manipulate the cards, but he only messes up once, and Oh-chan pretends not to notice. At the end, when Oh-chan picks a card and sees that it's the same as the first one, he reacts with loud, genuine enthusiasm.
"So cool," he gushes, smiling wide.
Kazunari smiles bashfully. "Thanks, Oh-chan."
They go through it a few more times so that Kazunari can practice handling the cards, and Oh-chan reacts the same way each time, until Kazunari is laughing too hard to shuffle anymore. He puts the cards away, and they settle down on the bed, both of them tired from all the excitement.
After a few minutes of sleepy silence, Kazunari says, "Hey, Oh-chan."
Oh-chan is lying motionless at his side, probably already halfway into a nap. "Hm?"
"Do you think you're magic?"
Oh-chan seems to think about it, quiet for a while. Finally he says, "Might be."
It's pretty much what Kazunari was expecting. "Or maybe you used to be human," he offers, "and then you were reincarnated."
"Maybe."
"Or maybe an evil sorcerer stuck your soul in a stuffed bear as punishment for stealing an ancient artifact -- like a... a spellbook or something."
"Possible."
"Or maybe you're a ghost who has unfinished business here in the physical world."
Oh-chan makes a noise of uncertainty. "That one's a little silly."
Kazunari laughs, nudging Oh-chan with his elbow. "Why that one!"
Oh-chan laughs too, helplessly amused by Kazunari's reaction. When they've settled down once again, he asks, "Do you believe in those things?". He doesn't sound accusing, just curious.
"Not really," Kazunari admits. "But then again, I didn't believe in talking bears, either."
"Mm." He can feel Oh-chan stretch out beside him, settling in for a nap. "Yeah," Oh-chan agrees, voice growing sleepier by the second. "I guess anything is possible."
~
"You've been spending a lot of time with Sho-kun lately."
There's no judgement in Oh-chan's voice, not even a little, but Kazunari can't help the guilt he feels at those words. "He's been helping me study," he mumbles, tapping his pencil against the cover of his econ textbook. "Since he already graduated, he knows what I should pay attention to for finals."
Oh-chan doesn't move. "Mm."
When Oh-chan doesn't say anything else, Kazunari allows himself to look away, biting his lip as he ponders. There's so much he wants to say, but Sho's coming to pick him up, and he doesn't know how much time he and Oh-chan have together.
"Oh-chan," he finally says. "I wanted to tell you... I got that scholarship I applied for."
"That's great," Oh-chan says. He doesn't sound particularly enthusiastic, his voice as calm as ever, but that's just how he is when it comes to things that aren't food or magic tricks. Kazunari knows he means it.
"And I've been wondering," Kazunari continues, "when I go off to college, if I... if I should bring you along or not."
"Mm."
When Kazunari glances back at Oh-chan, his eyes are closed, and his chest is rising and falling at a calm, even pace, like he's already slipping into a nap. Kazunari says quietly, "I just feel like other people might think it's kind of weird."
Slowly, Oh-chan's eyes drift open as he turns to look at Kazunari. "Do they think it's weird, or do you?"
Kazunari feels stung by those words. Ever since that first night, he's always wanted to tell people, he's wanted to tell everyone, about Oh-chan. But he knew, instinctively, that talking to his stuffed animal and having it talk back probably wasn't normal; he didn't want to deal with people telling him he was crazy, he definitely didn't want his mother to have to deal with something like that on top of everything else she had to deal with, and most of all, he didn't want anyone to try and take Oh-chan away from him. So he kept Oh-chan to himself -- their little secret -- and neither of them ever minded before.
But the older he gets, the higher the stakes become. What would people say now if they knew about Oh-chan?
And the older he gets, the more he starts to suspect that whatever they'd say might actually be true.
"I don't know," he says. Despite the fibs he tells every day, he's never been able to lie to Oh-chan.
Oh-chan purses his mouth at that. "I guess it is a little weird," he says, shrugging. "Weird never bothered me. But I'd understand."
There's no doubt in Kazunari's mind that Oh-chan, just like before, just like always, means every word he says. He doesn't know how to respond. He doesn't know what could possibly be said.
At his side, his phone buzzes. It's a message from Sho. Here.
"Oh-chan." As he stands up, Kazunari tries to apologize with his expression, with his tone, unable to do it in words. "I have to go."
Oh-chan's mouth turns up in a gentle smile, mirroring his sleepy eyes. He watches Kazunari gather his things, and he keeps smiling. "I understand."
~
"Pretty, aren't they?"
There aren't many stars visible from Kazunari's bedroom window, not this deep in the city, but the ones they can see are bright and sparkly enough to make the sight worthwhile. Oh-chan peers up through the window, following Kazunari's gaze, and agrees wordlessly.
"Have you seen them before?" Kazunari asks, glancing down at Oh-chan. "Before you were with me, I mean."
Oh-chan thinks about it, and finally says, "I guess so."
Kazunari rests his elbow on the windowsill, chin perched on his hand. "What else have you seen?"
"Mountains," Oh-chan answers after some thought. "Forests. Deserts. Snow. I think I like the ocean."
Kazunari groans, wrinkling his nose. "I hate the ocean!"
Oh-chan doesn't agree or disagree, just asks, "What's it like?"
Kazunari splutters. "How can you not know? You just said you like it!"
Oh-chan simply shrugs.
Kazunari scowls, but answers anyway, unable to resist Oh-chan's constant and endearing curiosity. "If you go to the beach, there's sand everywhere and it gets in everything. There'd be sand in your stuffing if you went. And if you're in the water, it's all wavy and bouncy."
"And you don't like that?"
"I went on a boat once with my grandma and I threw up."
Oh-chan makes a noise of sympathy. When he finally speaks again, all he says is, "But I like it."
"Seriously," Kazunari groans, "have you been there or not?"
Oh-chan shrugs. "Dunno."
"Ugh, you're so weird." Kazunari sighs and looks back up at the stars, twinkling as if they're laughing fondly at him. "If it were with you," he says quietly, "I'd try the ocean again."
"Even if you might throw up again?"
Kazunari bristles at the memory, but smiles at the thought of being there with Oh-chan. "Maybe if I'm with you, I won't get sick." He imagines them there, on the beach, rolling in the sand, floating on the waves. He doesn't particularly like any of those things -- he can barely even stand PE -- but it's fun to think about doing them with Oh-chan at his side. He thinks of all the other places Oh-chan has already-maybe visited, thinks about the two of them baking in the desert, shivering in the snow, climbing the oldest trees, scaling the tallest mountains...
"It's settled," he decides, throwing an arm around Oh-chan's tiny shoulders. "We'll definitely go there together some day."
Oh-chan makes a quiet sound of contentment and smiles, leaning into Kazunari's side. "I think I'd like that."
~
"Wake up, Oh-chan."
Oh-chan's eyes slowly blink open. "Ah," he murmurs, rubbing at his eyes with balled-up paws. "Welcome back."
"Shh." Kazunari reaches down to pick Oh-chan up from where he'd been napping, in his usual spot on the pillow. He rubs his thumbs up and down Oh-chan's soft belly, and wonders if Oh-chan has always been this small. "Sho-kun's here," he whispers. "We found a nice place by his new job. We're packing up today."
Oh-chan smiles, slow and sincere. "I'm really happy for you."
Kazunari's heart clenches in his chest. "Thank you, Oh-chan."
With a stifled yawn, Oh-chan stretches his arms up over his head. The stitches holding him together are starting to fray a little. "I'm pretty sleepy," he says, arms coming back down to rest against Kazunari's wrists.
"Gonna take another nap while I'm gone?"
Oh-chan shrugs. His little paws stroke Kazunari's skin, and then they go still. "Maybe longer than a nap this time." His eyes are already starting to drift closed again.
Kazunari swallows thickly, feeling his heartbeat all the way in his throat. He pulls Oh-chan to his chest, hugging him fiercely. "Sweet dreams, Oh-chan."
He hears a single, quiet syllable, mumbled into the folds of his shirt: "Mm."
Behind Kazunari, faint laughter from the kitchen grows louder, and then Sho is standing there in the doorway, holding a stack of flat boxes in one arm and a plate of cookies in the other. "Nino, your mom is insisting we take this -- hey, what's that?"
Kazunari turns, still clutching Oh-chan tight. He realizes that's what he's doing and forces himself to pull Oh-chan away, holding him at arm's length. "Oh, this -- this is Oh-chan. I've had him since I was little."
"Cute!"
Sho drops the boxes in the doorway, and sets the cookies on the dresser, and steps over to Kazunari's side to look down at Oh-chan -- at Oh-chan's dark fur and blond tummy, his sleepy eyes...
"He's adorable," Sho says, smiling like he really means it and not like he's just being polite; it's been long enough now that Kazunari can tell the difference. When he doesn't respond, Sho looks up at him, watches him for a moment before nudging him gently. "You okay?"
"I'm fine." Kazunari doesn't quite believe the words even as he says them. "I guess I just didn't realize how much I missed him."
Sho takes Oh-chan from Kazunari's hold -- Kazunari lets him -- and says, "Let's bring him along." Kazunari fixes him with a skeptical stare, but Sho doesn't back down. "Seriously! I've got a whole box of sentimental stuff from when I was a kid, just in case I ever want to look at it again. It's just one box, you know? It's not like it's taking up a bunch of space. No harm done."
Kazunari looks back down at Oh-chan, resting in Sho's gentle hands. "Yeah," he says. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He reaches up to stroke the soft fur of Oh-chan's ears, and that familiar gesture, mixed with fond memories, the home he's leaving but can always come back to, the woman who raised him and is waiting to send him off with laughter and a plate of cookies instead of tears, the man he loves standing beside him... All of it together makes him smile, big and genuine, makes him feel light. He turns to lay a quick kiss on Sho's mouth, and he pulls Oh-chan back to his chest. "Okay," he says, more sure of himself this time. "Let's bring him along."
Sho is grinning, with his mouth and with his eyes. "Besides," he adds, "even if you don't look at him all the time, it'll be nice to know he's there for you if you need him."
~
"Hey, look. You're not crying."
Kazunari hadn't really been thinking of it as they lie there, curled around each other under the blankets. He can still hear his mother crying in the room beside his, but it's true what Oh-chan said: when he touches his cheeks, he finds them dry. "Yeah," he says. "I guess not."
In the darkness, he feels Oh-chan's paw touch his hand. "I'm sorry your mom gets so sad."
Kazunari nods, using Oh-chan's go-to response. "Mm."
"And I'm sorry your dad is away so often."
Kazunari shrugs. "Mm."
"But I'm glad you're not crying. I hate when you cry."
At that, Kazunari laughs. "Oh-chan, you've only seen me cry that one time."
"Yeah," Oh-chan agrees. "But I really hated it."
"Well I told you I wouldn't anymore as long as you stayed with me. And you did."
Oh-chan says nothing in response, but Kazunari knows he heard.
"I think that's why it's okay," Kazunari says after a moment of pondering. "I hate that my mom is sad, but I know she'll be all right, because even if my dad doesn't stick around, I will. I'll always stay with her. I won't ever make her cry." Oh-chan snuggles closer, silent. Without thinking, Kazunari reaches up to stroke his ears. "And you'll never make me cry, either."
Kazunari's a smart kid, that much he knows is true. The adults in his life are always telling him so, and he's good at magic, and he's good at predicting what people are going to do or say. Despite all of that, he can't tell what the future will bring -- how could he? He knows, after all, that magic isn't real, no matter how badly he wants to believe.
But he does know that what he's saying right now is true. Wholly, irrefutably true. Nothing in his life has ever been more real.
"You'll always be there when I need you, right, Oh-chan?"
Oh-chan reaches out to pat one fuzzy paw against Kazunari's stomach. In the quiet dark of their room, he sighs softly into the folds of Kazunari's shirt, and then he speaks, his voice sleepy-soft.
"Always."
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You have no idea how long I've had that Whinne The Pooh thing in my head but could never get around to write it myself but now I'm glad I didn't because I got to read this!
"Do you know what the Spanish word for bear is?"
Kazunari doesn't know why his father would ask about bears, but he doesn't question it yet, just shakes his head no.
"Oso," his father says. "Can you try? Oso."
Kazunari repeats dutifully, "Oh-so!"
I loved that this is how Oh-chan got his name and especially since my native language is Spanish.
I loved everything about this fic, really: Oh-chan being there for Nino even though he's spends less time with him as he grows up because he understands and Sho being such a sweetheart. Just everything.
Thank you very much anon-san for writing such a lovely fic.
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(Anonymous) 2014-06-18 04:22 am (UTC)(link)no subject
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This was so cute, I loved it!!
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oh-chan the teddy bear! i loved how he was generally sleepy, non-judgemental and the sweetest thing ever <3 I loved the whole friendship and I'm glad that Nino got to bring him without feeling all weird about it in the end because Sho asked him to <333
I really liked this. thank you <3
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Good job, anon. ;__;
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The way you built up this story was really great, how you gradually led us through everything and then the last sentence, while we knew Ohchan was already gone. Damn. That hit me harder than I wanted to. Still, very good, very... dunno... it feels like the word precious really fits this fic.
Thank you so much for sharing it with us. I enjoyed it very much :)
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(Anonymous) 2014-06-18 08:59 pm (UTC)(link)no subject
WHY AM I GOING TO CRY?
Agh, this was so wonderful and touching and perfect. And a little bit weird too, but just like Ohno, I like that. ♥
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I love how Nino and Oh-chan's friendship was portrayed and ugh I'm bawling when Oh-chan was starting to get sleepy again even though he's there physically. Plus, how sweet can Sho get?
/wipes tears
/cries again
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